04-10-2023, 05:40 PM
(04-10-2023, 05:16 PM)Stevenator_ Wrote: It seems at least that you are getting positive response in public, whether it's wanted or unwanted.Omfg, US idiots are so bad because they blurt it all out... Finns will just quietly stare unless they're drunk, almost zero chance of getting open transphobia here, its extremely rare. I think the problem is that for most people you register as "openly trans/queer" looking rather androgynous? That's the problem, people are fucking nasty about anything outside of cis hetero norms.
When I was in Florida recently, I went out braless in my standard tank top and I got openly mocked by huge ugly troll of a man at a bar by the fishing dock because my nipples were so prominently visible. I had on a nice unbuttoned Cuban shirt over the tank top, hoping it would camouflage my figure & nipples, but it did not. Needless to say the dude made me very uncomfortable.
A week or so prior to the trip, I was wearing something almost identical when the wife & I stopped by a local bar for a bite & a couple of beers and I got death-ray stares by a few women at that bar, too.
Needless to say, I'm rethinking my approach to being "out" in public.
Hang in there, girl! <3
For me its easy irl, I stealth completely. Not even my girlfriends parents know about my background, to them I'm just a girl. As I am to all strangers these days. The weird thing is, irl I'm getting a lot of positive feedback in the way people, especially men, react to me. There's a stark difference to social media where I appear to be hated or ignored by almost everybody except creepy men and obviously trans women either envy me or they love me a lot. Its kinda crazy, right now I have at least three more girlfriend candidates, one of whom is swearing she's coming to see me and stuff. I have experienced this with cis women back in the day when I was considered conventionally attractive to them. Now its like everybody else hates me or doesn't care, but certain trans women absolutely melt and I put in zero effort with them.
The strange part is how mixed the reception is. I have been told by cis guys so many times that I'm average, "nice", mediocre, typical forty year old Finnish woman and all this bs, I really don't know what is the truth. Are the standards just so insane online? Are cis men blind moronic asshats? I can't know, I don't even see myself the same within a same day and I need outside validation and feedback to understand it. Its so strangely mixed its confusing. In real life, I get stared at a lot by 30-50 year old guys and not in the bad way, I can tell as just two years ago it was murder stare all the way or total ignorance, now they look up and down and can't take their eyes off me and I quite often get smirks and smiles and stuff, Finnish men do that to women they see as attractive, otherwise its total pokerface or blatant hateful angry stare. I just can't tell, online is much more harsh and negative in comparison. Also another thing to point out is how some older ladies frown upon me, looking at me like I'm some goddamn dog poop and I know why they do that.. They're jealous.