28-01-2022, 10:05 AM
(28-01-2022, 08:23 AM)Drew Wrote: I missed the arguments and insulting, Bobbi told me about it so had to go back and look.
Not the first and definitely won't be the last those, seeking attention even negative attention is attention they will always surface from time to time, just best to ignore them and not give them what they are after.
Easier said than done I know, I myself love a bitch slapping fight and cannot resist but is more sensible to ignore. Sometimes just a single word may trigger a nerve in a person and cause them to flame and insult.
Recently you accused me of envy too which at first I was insulted but then just shrugged it off as I thought it's not intended as an insult just an unfortunate choice of words so decided not to be insulted as I think mine are really cute so DiDi can't possibly be aiming to insult. But point is reacting to a person who is seeking any kind of attention will just fuel their cause and no matter what your reply may be will be misenterprated and they will attempt to make themselves the victim and the more angry and insulting you get that will in some weird way may make them feel they are winning.
Just be ladylike and deny them the attention they are seeking. There will be more, even we had a brief fight here but was so long ago I cannot even remember what it was about.
I used to be like that, I could never give up a flame war.... These days its somewhat easier but this person really hurt me and I had to vent.
I'm sorry if it came out like that, I didn't really accuse you of anything. <3
Attention, yes, envy, yes... Projection insecurities and dypshoria, yes. All that is very naive and ugly stuff. And also very understandable in a way. But I think its quite horrible that someone can not have any better way to vent out frustration. When I feel bad about myself, I go to my friends or my girlfriend and cry against somebody's shoulder or just scream into the void, its much better than pouring it on others, which some times isn't easy to avoid.
Oh and there will definitely be more, I'm sure of that. Trans women are often quite traumatized and broken people and the pressure about looks and dysphoria and all that is often through the roof. And also, many are hugely jealous of those with lucky genetic roll on hormone treatment and who go through some serious effort to make a difference. Most of us don't, they just pop their titty skittles and take their injections and that's about the extent of their HRT. I believe in not leaving any stone turned and experimenting and trying out everything that can help. I have a very good motivation for it and that's lack of money, as I can't have lot of surgeries to fix me, then nature has to do it or fail trying which on its own is definitely worth the effort. But to some my only saving grace is like a red cloth to a bull and that will not change, I can't decide on how people feel about these things.
I think its unfortunate, the ridiculous standards we try to live by make it happen. Everyone's body is unique and different and we all react differently on NBE and HRT and so on and there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. If the perceived beauty standards were different, so would be the attitude about all this. And of people wouldn't have their massive confidence issues, that might help too.
Its silly, to one I'm ugly bulky fat ogre, to another curvy and beautiful. And my own perception keeps on bouncing between the extremes.