(14-12-2021, 06:49 PM)Sonya Wrote: Hold on DiDi, since when did this become a poularity contest?. She who has the bigest, bounciest most round tits wins.... what exactly?. We are here to tell our experiences, seek help, and encourage one another. Writing here helps you get things out of your system, and others to understand they are not the only ones with these issues. Are we special ?, I'm afraid we are not, we're not the first ones through this, we won't be the last ones either. Do each of us have a unique story and path through NBE/Transition/Woman-ism/Whatever you want to call it?. Absolutely!. Are our stories worth telling? Absolutely!. Do we only care about how big your tits got this week? Hell no!. If you want to take a break that's great, but please don't do it because you think no one cares unless you post a new boobie pic, your experience as a transgender and your feelings are far far more valuable.
Hey Sonya. <3
I'm not talking about BN on its own, my distress is more making of FB and Reddit than BN forum.... Its just a saturation point of everything. I'm mentally extremely tired. My body dysmorphia / gender dysphoria have hit such fever pitch I must distance myself a bit.
I've had several really shitty things happen one after another lately and it all just adds up. I'm exhausted. Things outside my control have gone wrong. This has not helped with my mental issues of course which I have to address somehow. I don't want to end up becoming a statistic.
Having good time with my cousin right now, her company is really helpful actually. Keeps me away from the online stuff most of the day. Trans clinic doctor today afternoon. I hope it goes well.
EDIT:
I see my appointment has been changed from a face to face meeting into a Teams call on the last minute... Good I guess, it saves me the trouble from looking up the place. (I haven't ever visited in that hospital before and lot of Helsinki is quite unknown for me outside the city center. I've been talking with Lotus again, some very affirming things. And some very interesting stuff about breast growth and HRT etc.
ime off most social media is really called for. I've been here for two days, most of the time having something better to do than sink my mind in the dysphoria swamp... Its helpful.
My cousin has been more than helpful too, she's so nice. Treating me well and she said some things that really struct a chord. She told me she doesn't even remember the guy anymore as I read completely female now. (She barely recognized me on the train station even though we met just weeks prior. She said my face is changing a lot. She also said I'm pretty... And the most intriguing thing, if I didn't come out as trans, its likely we wouldn't even be in contact. I tried to ask why so but she was kinda cryptic about it. Suits me fine, I'm getting such girl friendship with her which I've missed for a very long time. There's a little difference, trans friends is one thing, but a relative and cis woman is another. She feels a lot like a sister I never had. I've always had a longing for a big sister type of friend and I think that's my cousin. She's a sweetheart, makes me feel so good as she treats me as a woman without any question about it. I think she keeps on forgetting that I'm trans because we've talked about lot of the kind of ladies stuff which isn't much a thing with someone without the correct plumbing downstairs. If she turns out to become my big sister for real, meeting up and calling me often, I'm welcoming that with open arms. Its a breath of fresh air. There's just one issue, boob envy, she's got nearly twice what I got. xD darn it. Need to grow more, I wanna surpass her. lol.