Now Bobbi, as far as my signature.  It's a regional thing.  Everyone knows what you mean when you call someone an "ass".  It means that person is uncaring, goes out of his/her way to be so.  And of course, a clown means "hiding your true self by pretending to be something or someone you're not."  Combine the two, and for me it means someone is trying to hide or maintain a facade of not caring or being mean to other's, or some would call it "Tough Love".

During fetal development a surge of testosterone (or lack there of) determines sexual differentiation (sexuality/gender). When it (sex differences) shows up in life is the question, reports say it starts between 2-4 yrs old, however, I think it shows up at anytime. Additionally, I think the liver and the hypothalamus have a lot to do changing ones sexuality/gender, (further info is posted in the X thread). 


Sexual differentiation of the human brain: relation to gender identity, sexual orientation and neuropsychiatric disorders.

Abstract
During the intrauterine period a testosterone surge masculinizes the fetal brain, whereas the absence of such a surge results in a feminine brain. As sexual differentiation of the brain takes place at a much later stage in development than sexual differentiation of the genitals, these two processes can be influenced independently of each other. Sex differences in cognition, gender identity (an individual's perception of their own sexual identity), sexual orientation (heterosexuality, homosexuality or bisexuality), and the risks of developing neuropsychiatric disorders are programmed into our brain during early development. There is no evidence that one's postnatal social environment plays a crucial role in gender identity or sexual orientation. We discuss the relationships between structural and functional sex differences of various brain areas and the way they change along with any changes in the supply of sex hormones on the one hand and sex differences in behavior in health and disease on the other.
Copyright © 2011 Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
PMID 21334362 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/21334362/?i=4&from=/12575757/related

Thanks Iaboy and Lotus!
Wonderful insights and very enlightening.
Its time to go back to bed since I learned something new today. :-)
What an amazing place this is!!!
Bobbi

Indeedy

It's called balance

Yes e may calm , but it's also Pandora box 

It can start a craving that you may never stop through will power alone

As said in my other threads, e for some balances and shuts the box

Then others after 4/5 years the body needs more e to stabilise and then oh bum I'm a woman that cannot hide the boobs 

Then what the fuck do you do ?????

F nightmare 

Julie

Then others after 4/5 years the body needs more e to stabilise and then oh bum I'm a woman that cannot hide the boobs 

Then what the fuck do you do ?????

F nightmare 

Julie

After 4-5 yrs?, maybe, just maybe, your already a woman at that point......if not, man-up and own those boobs you've created. 

Sorry meant
4/5 years low dose hrt when people think their stabilising rather than transitioning

Then body grabs the need for e and they have too transition 

Julie

Then others after 4/5 years the body needs more e to stabilise and then oh bum I'm a woman that cannot hide the boobs 

Then what the fuck do you do ?????

F nightmare 

Julie

After 4-5 yrs?, maybe, just maybe, your already a woman at that point......if not, man-up and own those boobs you've created. 

Shoot, what to do now?  I dunno.  It's screwed up, cause everyone expects me to be Grandpa, not a fake Grandma.  Maybe I should just cancel my appointment and deal with it like I have for the last 30 years.

Then others after 4/5 years the body needs more e to stabilise and then oh bum I'm a woman that cannot hide the boobs 

Then what the fuck do you do ?????

F nightmare 

Julie

After 4-5 yrs?, maybe, just maybe, your already a woman at that point......if not, man-up and own those boobs you've created. 

Shoot, what to do now?  I dunno.  It's screwed up, cause everyone expects me to be Grandpa, not a fake Grandma.  Maybe I should just cancel my appointment and deal with it like I have for the last 30 years.

That sounds like those doubts again, going round and around. It's enough to make a guy drink.

its difficult shit hun,

as one girl says here,

I dare not try HRT as it will mean to me I am really on my way, and may not be able too stop myself,

I share same feelings,

Lots of TG even those who present significantly as female are on low dose hrt or herbs to take the edge off
gender incongruity feelings,

When its official and there is a script in front of you, it has to be like candy in a sweetshop ?

I know there and others do there is a BIG mental difference to HRT and pm,

HRT makes me feel completely and totally male, and purge time comes, but my fear is what if the gi or gd comes back when your on HRT , all you can do is up the dose to calm and then months later it happens again,

Read susans and bigender net, lots on there,

However at your age it may be ok , you could hold on and not transition, younger say my age ???????????????

ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Julie

Shoot... I have to partially agree with the above post. While on low dose HRT I've been feeling more myself and at ease. That's not to say "male" as I've internally always been somewhere in between. I have a feeling things may start getting wonky once my dose increases.

Don't feel like you're the only one. Many of us have hit that fork in the road. Do I push my feelings aside for another ten years and let it fester into a mental illness? Or do I take the jump into full scale HRT and let the beast out of the cage, causing it's own brand of havoc? I don't have AS much an issue with such decisions because I live each day not worrying about the next. I jump hurdles as I arrive at them. This is both a strength AND a weakness.