A noogley milestone
So tomorrow is a big day for me even though its not measuring day, but I felt it was time to make a post talking about how NBE has been working for me, my mood and my emotions and how this ties together goals I've have towards furthering my transition and my thoughts on that.
At the start I was quite worried about its effects upon me and my health in particular, diabetes and how it feels to even be in deep remission and perfectly centreing my BMI, it still stalks me and that plays on my mind quite often. As I've got diabetes quite young in life at 30 I've had it for 5 years now and I wonder what sort of damage I'll have compared to someone whos twice my age who has only just got it. How much this damage adds up over the years and this does leave me with a constant specter in my life. As such this became a hard choice for me going forward I felt like I needed to do something as I wanted not just more size but to also reach Tanner stage 5 and all too often do transgirls actually stall out and never actually reach T5. So I weighed everything, my choice and my goals together and did my research there are still something's I'm still cautious about aka Royal Jelly but for now I honestly can't make up my mind.
Tomorrow I'll be doing 4 hours of noogle spread evenly throughout the day, this will bring my
total hours to a little above 200. Since I began this journey back in July I was training tolerance under Laras tutelage and guidance in preparing myself for longer periods of time. Slowly as I began to reach a full hour I began to implement the missing pieces of Phase 1 specifically GABA and Calcium. My training continued as I could do 2 hours a day at this point I quickly added a 3rd and 4th to my regime. Now I fluctuate moving my total number around each day but I try to average at least above 70 and this month is over 80
with a guaranteed rest day on Sundays.
I might be a little unique on breast growth particular in that I've always grown a lot and fast during this time of year until December I experience a massive spurt and have done it each year of my transition. With only last year from september I zoomed from a B to a DD. The difference this time is I have NBE and noogle at my wayside and have already reported a 16% increase with a mere 15 days, this Tuesday 4th October I'll be measuring once more to see where I am. I've already out grew the rebel E as it got way to sore and confining. I decided to buy a Pour moi scandalous as a 36FF yes the very Bra our dear Lara has especially considering her rave reviews and its elasticity I expect it to last a long time and I adore it.
Emotionally this has been quite a wild ride, I never thought I could break the DD barrier like this for me, E came and went and I'm already in FF territory having 15 days ago measured 1365.08ccs and with FF starting at 1370cc its quite likely I'm already entering or have entered a very exclusive club. Mentally I'm ecstatic I adore my girls being trans they have been like the biggest thing missing in my life and makes me feel more complete if not whole, a piece of undeniable femininity. My goal is kind of loose I see 36GG as the point I'd love to reach an undeniable boob size that is without a doubt very flaunting but would I go bigger if I could, well it depends on a multitude of factors and especially health and can I handle it. I mean its easy to say (OK I'LL GO RIGHT TO 36LL AND BE AROUND 5000CC) as fun as that is to imagine I can imagine some real backache oof. Even now I feel some ache in my back I'm quite short and well a great t blocker also means no muscles so some weight to lift
but with all things its interesting to ponder the true limits of NBE. I see so many doing BO and getting endless growth until they stop with their goals, I mean has there ever been someone that stopped caused they literally couldn't get more? Its an interesting idea tho scary to test more so
The reality of this, is that its become a piece of my whole journey, a lot of the time we transgirls are given HRT and a good luck wave that you develop well, 99% of the time the program follows wpath not taking into account that the individual may need to mimic a cisgirl more accurately. Or that the vast majority of doctors don't provide progesterone either, stalling many girls all over the place especially T3 and god forbid low dose E stalling many at T2 by most wpath practitioners with 150pg/ml being considered "FINE"
Even getting all this perfectly T5 remains out of reach for the majority of transgirls all over the world and NBE is interesting because it gives us continued growth and maturation of breasts. So my desires are not simply "LETS GO BIG" but it is bringing my breasts into the day where I look in the mirror and that they match that of a full grown women and that dysphoria washes away.
Mood wise I have been in a darkplace I was recommended by my clinic to cease my intake of Finasteride, mostly due to its interactions with my Decapeptyl and inadvertently raising T. With that removed I began to suffer from Post-Finasteride Syndrome specifically Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal tendencies. My darkness of my past came forth and haunted me over the past 2 weeks sending me on a episode trip where I'd cry in bed. It has been tough and I've spent a lot of my time hiding away from the world and avoiding tasks while it persisted. Only over the past few days has it began to wear off and my mood begin to improve and my feet finally landing on the ground.
September the 8th was also my Birthday, I got a great many gifts from friends and family alike and it was by far the best one yet leaving me with a lot of hope for the future that was a little tumbled these past 2 weeks but I'm getting there. <3
Lastly soon I might have a huge opportunity in life where I'll be taking up a new apprenticeship program in a whole new field, as I made a huge commitment to pivot away from software engineering things are finally starting to converge on the idea that I can really live the life I've been missing out on. This sort of post I'm going to do at the end of each month think of it like a state of the nation or breast or just what's been on my mind or life in general.
Anyway as hinted in Laras thread here is my yellow sweater
Oh and a picture of me after my Birthday on the 9th at 1:30am I think I look pretty good for 35 and no makeup. Yes my hair in the avatar is straightened its very curly o.o!!:
I'll try to pop in when I can. 
