[Dianna1395]

and more hope
another mtf,

I actually have no loss of libido. Erections need more mental stimulation and love making sounds really stimulate me... and the orgasims are way OTT. My endo and therapist continue to be somewhat suprised as I'm on a full dosage. Maybe alot has to do with pre HRT and your libido then? I had a really active sex life before and I was worried about the loss. Guess its different for each of us.

and this from a WIFE of an mtf

Veronica, I am providing a different point of view as the GG spouse of a MTF. My spouse started hormones in January. She spoke with her doctor about her needs and concerns. Some doctors do take the attitude of it being a black and white situation. Some doctors think like some have posted in here that if you want to have breasts but still be able to function it must be for the wrong reasons. But her doctor, like Linda stated, does believe in the rainbow.

My spouse has been in gender therapy counseling for 2 years before starting hormones. She told her doctor that she wants to be able to maintain a sexual relationship with. The doctor put her on a regimen that has resulted in breast growth and still allows her to have an erection. While it does take some work, and as a heterosexual female I do miss the ability to have that certain affect on my spouse simply from a certain look or pose, it works for us. There has been some softening of body hair and slower growth in some areas but not all and her hips have either spread or gotten rounder. It has affected her emotionally. There has also been leg cramps and nipples that are so sore just her shirt rubbing against her makes her cringe.

Yes, my spouse has always felt like she was a female in a male body. However, she has never hated her penis. I have made a lot of sacrafices in staying with her, to include my son and daughter no longer talking to me. Marriage is about compromise, it is about putting someone else's needs above your own. Her choice is because she loves me and she wants me to have happiness too and neither of us wants to lose the other. So her choice has been to live happily today and not concentrate on SRS. We both understand this is not a popular point of view from other's perspectives. As someone else posted, the majority of post-ops end up alone. For her, that is not what will make her happy. Being female is how she feels and how she sees herself. How you see yourself and how you express that is a choice each of us should have the right to make individually.

Julie,
This is interesting and supports something I noticed. (Time makes things a little questionable, but... )
TMI warning! I was going to edit it down a bit, but the second quote made me decide to leave in all information.

TMI warning! (Again)
When I was late 20s, had a great girlfriend - I was on estrogen, up to 5 mg / day Premarin. 200 mg/ day Spiro, too. Clinical dosages, real hormones, that's when I grew the glands in my chest, as opposed to the fatty moobs.
I got a hard-on walking up to her door. Never left her unsatisfied. Lots of foreplay, and lots of hardcore f*cking.
Now, I'm essentially on nothing (change-o-life herbals).
I get a hard-on, and the woman makes it go away. By touching it. (Maybe the snapping of her teeth has something to do with it? Like Chatterer from Hellraiser series? Perhaps? )
A few times of that, and it's trying to crawl up inside me whenever she walks towards me. She thinks it's funny.... I've told her it's unappealing, and she does it more. Hmmm.....

And when I can get past that, it's almost like, "push, push, OK, I'm done."

And that's on TESTOSTERONE.... :-P (But of a 40-year-old who has done estrogen HRT, but family history suggests high DHT - Father's side was Q-balls.)

Oh, and BTW, she's not interested in foreplay. Or fitness, or Trans anything... So, maybe it's "all mental"...

Now, I hope I didn't derail things with this, but the comparison, plus the "sex is in the mind," concept, made it seem justified, at least.

-Jean