[Larana]

I know how you feel, Spanky. I've read several books to date about the experiences of transsexuals, and I'm not sure I have the strength to go through what is required to fully transition, and I hope I don't have to. It is a daunting process emotionally and physically. I've met a couple of TS women lately and had a chance to talk about their experiences. Their words only reinforced the perception that the risks one faces in deciding to go down that path are huge.

The key is to find that 'middle ground' where one's dysphoria is reduced to a tolerable level. Where that point is for me is still a huge question. I haven't reached it yet. Why? I don't know why -- I've come so far already, but the train keeps moving down the track.

I used to think it a ridiculous notion that I could resemble a woman enough to make a successful transition. And, I know today that I could never be the woman I've dreamed of being. Being transgender is a cruel trick unlike other birth defects that are easier to understand.

But, my thinking is changing. There are lots of transwomen that are not attractive. It isn't a question of whether they 'pass' or not, it's a question of matching their gender identity to their gender role even if the gender role part falls short. I also now see the tremendous power of HRT to transform the male body to one that is much more feminine in appearance. It takes a couple of years of consistent treatment, but the results are truly amazing. I think I could achieve a somewhat adequate physical transformation. Do I want to? Yes and no. As my wife says, all we can do is take it a step at a time. Eventually I'll reach my place of comfort.

I hope that everyone on this forum can match their place on the gender spectrum to a presentation and life style that brings mental peace and contentment to their lives. Unfortunately, there is no recipe for achieving that end. We all have to discover the best course for ourselves.

Good luck on your pursuit of that dream, Spanky.

Clara

Thank you so much for your perspective and thoughtful comments. I think I am several steps behind you on the path, maybe more than that. But I know I cannot simply "leave it where it lies." So instead of charging headlong, I am sauntering down a path, generally pretty happy with life and especially with my wife and family. I want it all, but I cannot risk it all, if you know what I mean.

I only occasionally think about full transition (SRS), so unless things change in the future, it will be somewhere within the spectrum rather than and one edge, for me. For now, I will stick with PM and AAs, but do not rule out a pharmaceutical approach should I stall short of a more comfortable spot.

Again, thank you for providing your wisdom.

As you mentioned: What is that DIM?