[lucyconfused]

Hi everyone, Im a 30 year old guy from the UK who has been crossdressing on and off for over half my life, in the last year more seriously with the fake boobs, wigs etc. I cant see myself as ever being true TS for many many reasons, partly the fact that Id never be convincing enough to satisfy myself, never mind anyone else, thats even before I think what it would do to my family......

Anyway I really have a fascination with boobs, especially lactating ones and have always had an overwhelming desire to have my own so last week brought 3 different herbs on ebay (NOT PM) plus a manual breast pump to see if I could induce lactating (I know its rare but my research says not impossible). I was amazed that after just 3 days my nipples have gone from small flat, average guy nips to being litterally twice as pointy, 100 times more sensitive to touch and the aerola is definately bigger, plus i seem to definately have more breast tissue going towards my armpit, giving a slight budding effect! on a slightly larger pectoral muscle than your average skinny guy(natural, I dont work out etc) I was amazed at this and expected changes to be slow, if not non existant, has anyone else had this?

Trouble is now Ive scared myself - do I keep going and see what happens (bearing in mind I can never hope to have a full pair of breasts due to my personal reasons. Im tall and skinnyish build so only so much can be blaimed on putting on weight man boobs lol) or do I stop and give up on what feels like a stupid idea? Also, so early on in taking suppliments, will these effects last or will they shrink again once the effects of the herbs wear off and hormones get back to normal?

The other question is has anyone managed to enduce even a little lactation? and if so how big do your boobs have to get? obviously lactation requires breast tissue but i cant get away with anything more than an a cup max (at the moment im a natural 38aa)

Any advice will be very greatfully accepted - Im not taking this lightly as its obviously life changing stuff and got no one to talk to in the real world

[Pansy-Mae]

Hi Lucy and welcome.

What you've described sounds fairly typical for the very beginning and is almost certainly not yet real budding. It is much more likely to be your nipples responding to the unacustomed level of stimulation and the beginnings of fat redistribution to a more female pattern. If I'm right then at the moment this is completely reversible - just stop and in a week or two you'd never know anything had happened. It may take up to 3 or 4 months for true budding to start ( although it can be quicker than that) and at that point things start to become irreversible.

To answer your second question, yes lactation is possible although fairly rare. Cheryl1989 is the best example, just do a search for her name, although hormonally she is unusual to begin with. I don't know much about this subject but I believe you need progesterone/prolactins to get this work, but you need a reasonable amount of breast development first anyway.

Hope this helps.

[Isabelle]

Welcome Lucy,

I agree with Pansy Mae. Lactation is a lot of work. First you need estrogens to build the milk ducts and to push your nipples and areolas out. Then (after 5-6 years) you need progesterone to develop glandular and alveolar tissue. No milk glands, no milk

Then you need prolactin to actually start milk production. And finally, you need oxytocin to start the breast contractions that actually drive the milk out. Only Cheryl1989 has ever gone that far on this forum. I would look for herbs that are given to women to start uterine contractions for labor, like rosemary, or raspberry leaf.

Picture yourself as an 11 year young girl and plan your first breastfeeding by age 23. The most knowledgeable person on the forum who has studied this path is Melissa4u. She is preparing her breasts for her second pregnancy, after the first breastfeeding went wrong.

About your experience: be prepared for a strong emotional reaction whenever you go too far, too far too fast, not far enough, or too slow. On the forum, we have learned that if you have a desire like lactation, it is real and it won't go away.

You came on too strong by starting three herbs and noogling at once. Slow the pace. Do only what feels right at this time. Give your emotions time to adjust, and give yourself time to figure out how you are going to fit this into or life, or how you are going to fit your life around it. You'll need 12 years anyhow, so relax. You may never consciously know what your ultimate goal is. Just do what makes you feel most comfortable at any moment.

The most important decision is when and how you are going to come clean about it to your wife, not if. She may like it, she may not. Start slowly, like commenting if you see something on TV together when you are both relaxed. It's like the process of coming out about cross dressing.

I do hope Cheryl and Melissa find this thread. If not, ask for their help directly.

[lucyconfused]

Hiya thanks for the info, its been about 36 hours since my last dose or pumping and things have settled back down again, got some serious thinking to do now if I want to continue or not, may continue but at a slower rate so things dont just pop up again overnight lol. On the plus side I found I felt a lot happier and calmer as Im normally very stressed and highly strung at work and can get mood swings for no reason, was even having sweet girly thoughts and it was fascinating having nipples that responded to cold and touch ete

Maybe its a case of finding a happy balance to keep that pyscological effect but less of the physical one

xxx

[julieTG]

WELCOME
Thats what this clubs all about,

Evolotionary 3rd species ?

Julie

[beverley.rose]

Hi everyone, Im a 30 year old guy from the UK who has been crossdressing on and off for over half my life, in the last year more seriously with the fake boobs, wigs etc. I cant see myself as ever being true TS for many many reasons, partly the fact that Id never be convincing enough to satisfy myself, never mind anyone else, thats even before I think what it would do to my family......

I started from exactly that position. Taking these herbs has changed my view and my goals and, for me, the mental changes have been stronger than the physical changes to date.

My body hair is getting finer, my shape is changing and I have lost a lot of male sexual urges. I can go without sex for weeks now and whilst arousal is possible, I now have to work at it just like a woman does. The old on/off switch that most men have no longer works for me. Read this http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=9798

I am not saying that this will happen to you, but it MIGHT do so be prepared. A year ago I would have placed myself solidly in the TV camp, now I am more TS than TV. If you do feminise, and grew breasts would you be prepared to be seen in public with them either as a male or a female. If the answer is no then you had best stop because once you have them they will not go away. I am not talking about transitioning here jsut asking what you will do if you grow a B cup. In my case, I already live as a woman so it is a no-brainer for me.

Find a support group and go there. If you are in the UK northwest then Manchester / Wales has good support and I can point them out to you.

Beverley

[lucyconfused]

You raise some good points, even more to think about! And as for the thrid species (or 3rd sex) comment, I think Im probably one of those, was just thinking that women always say men have got it easy but I think its the other way round!

If I were shorter, had more natural fem features anway younger and didnt have family I probably would be more towards the TS side - Ive always thought if I could magically go back in time to the point of my conception id change myself to a girl in a heartbeat (but then feel guilty as my children then wouldnt have been born - I overthink things way too much!) but as I am now I really dont see that happening and fear for the upset caused to other people, especially my kids so I just try to repress it I guess, and snatch a few hours of private girly time whenever i can. If I stay focused, I can go a month or so without dressing up etc but I do have to stay very focused! but then I always slip back to my old ways, which feels good at the time but then quite often feel guilty and confused after

Wow Im rambling so much sorry everyone! But this is the first time Ive found a site which consists of decent open minded people to talk to who dont seem to judge, so its a great relief in a way!

[/align]Thanks everyone xx

[sfem]

You're in the right place Lucy. You experiences are very similar to a lot of folks on here. Welcome.

[beverley.rose]

If I were shorter, had more natural fem features anway

Take the herbs for long enough and your features change, your skin softens and thins and your cheeks plump up. If you pluck your eyebrows and do not let your jaw hang loose (like most men do) then your face rounds out and you look more feminine. A permanent slight smile and you are nearly done.

....younger and didnt have family I probably would be more towards the TS side

That is the real difficulty. It can depend on the age of the kids and I think that girls are better at accepting this than boys. If you have teenage daughters then they may be a lot more accepting than you expect, especially if you present this as a medical issue/problem rather than a choice - do not let them assume that you chose to do this. Explain that you are driven, that it is like a racehorse springing out at the start of a race - it does not know why it is running, it just knows it has to run.

If I stay focused, I can go a month or so without dressing up etc but I do have to stay very focused! but then I always slip back to my old ways, which feels good at the time but then quite often feel guilty and confused after

We have all been there and done that. Many TVs have dumped their wardrobe in the skip to stop themselves, but it always returns and it is usually stronger when it does. Sooner or later you have to give in.

Wow Im rambling so much sorry everyone! But this is the first time Ive found a site which consists of decent open minded people to talk to who dont seem to judge, so its a great relief in a way!

I am willing to bet that you have never found anyone you can discuss this with before. Well, we are here but find a support group. You really need to talk this out with someone who understands.

Beverley

[lucyconfused]

Yes thats a good idea, if anyone knows of one in the surrey/hamsphire area in the UK please let me know! So far havent been able to really talk to anyone as most websites just seem to be aimed at the 'lets meet and have random sex' side of things which Im just not interested in! lol