[wee2er]

Hi Perky,

I agree with what's been said above, especially Lara's insights to forget about all the external stuff etc.

I'm male staying male, been on HRT for nearly 4-years now and still have zero desire to transition. Although saying that, HRT was one of the best decisions I've ever made, I simply run far better on female hormone levels.
Of course this far in, my body shape is becoming far more curvy which is brill, but it's the other benefits some unexpected such as clarity of mind, improved energy and concentration levels, feeling 10-years younger.
I think Lara's suggestion of trying HRT is a good one, as you know for sure then, and there's nothing to say that you will transition.

When I think back pre-HRT, I've had what some would say are femme traits all my life, hairless from the eyebrows down, always mixed plain womens styles with the odd pieces of mens clothing - leggings/skirts/short-shorts with a rugby top as an example. Nowadays, I'd say my wardrobe is c.90% womens, but all still very plain/androgynous. The only extra femme things I've introduced and this may well be the female-rewiring of my brain are things like a womens skincare routine, seamless bras to keep things supported., so not much else has changed.

Huck sums it up perfectly for "...I am in a transformation to a more feminine version of myself. One that I am comfortable with.."

[Stevenator_]

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Stevenator, you and I would probably enjoy drinking a few beers together. I am into motorsports, but two wheels.  I rode motocross and enduros for years.  Work in the powersports industry.  I raise cattle.  

Even after being off PM for over a year these feminine urges keep coming back stronger.  I don't know if I have subconsciously always had these urges or if NBE rewired my brain.  I don't plan on going back on PM or HRT.  For now I am going to settle into a new norm of panties and fully shaved under my normal male clothes.
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_________________________

I raise chickens ... LoL

We cover MotoAmerica & Supercross and the Barber Vintage Festival, too.

If you ever do decide to dip your toe into HRT, I'd try Estogel. But injections are much more economical in the long run.

Best of Luck to You.

[Vana_B]

Stevenator, you and I would probably enjoy drinking a few beers together. I am into motorsports, but two wheels.  I rode motocross and enduros for years.  Work in the powersports industry.  I raise cattle.  

Even after being off PM for over a year these feminine urges keep coming back stronger.  I don't know if I have subconsciously always had these urges or if NBE rewired my brain.  I don't plan on going back on PM or HRT.  For now I am going to settle into a new norm of panties and fully shaved under my normal male clothes.

I can relate a lot to this thread.  I tend to do cycles of PM/Estrogen/PG/RR/WP/etc and take breaks regain my 'manliness'.   For me, it is an all or nothing type of thing.   When I am on my 'program' it is "Vana" on the loose and in control.  I shave everything from my eyebrows to my toes, wear panties 24/7,  plucking and shaping my eyebrows, and lotion up everyday with my special feminizing brew of extracts.    I'm not into cross dressing, but exploring it at times.  Even my workouts change to be more shaping than building muscle.

When I am off my program,  I revert back male very quickly, except for the breasts, hips, and butt.   Within a couple weeks, my chest/nipples loses sensitivity, my lifting strength quickly returns, sex drive skyrockets, and  really enjoy feeling manly again.    All is good, but I am still counting the days until I go back on "my program".   I have had addictions in the past, and this feels somewhat like I an addiction, but I seem to be able to control it for the most part.

It's amazing how fast my body responds to E.  Within a couple days, my chest feels heavier, nipples more sensitive.  Within two weeks my skin is softer ( especially my inner thighs for some reason )  and much more calm and sex is out of this world.  I continue with my program months until I lose the sexual thrill that it brings me, then it's back to male mode to recover.   

I view M vs F as a spectrum where I range from solid male, to leaning female.   Through all the on/off  (more on than off)  I do have a solid B-cup and curves that don't look quite normal on a guy.  

Like Perky,  even when off my program I have become comfortable wearing panties, shaving smooth, skin care, and embracing my female side.    5 years ago, I would have laughed if you told me this.

[flamesabers]

Hello Perky,

Have any of you been here?  Where you able to maintain this or did your feminization continue further? What was your next steps?

I don't recall how much I posted in "males staying males" sub-forum, but there was a time when transitioning seemed like something that would never happen in my life. There's an inside joke that my friends here on BN all knew I was going to transition before I did! 

For me, the tipping point between (secretly) growing breasts via PM/wearing bras and officially transitioning was when I started on HRT.

I think the question of what constitutes being a "male staying male" and "transitioning" is highly individualized. Transitioning doesn't always have to be done openly. It can be done closeted/slowly for one reason or another. Likewise, a male staying male can do a lot of feminization but still live (and be happy doing so) as a male.

[tomi66]

Perky,
I can't tell you exactly when I started to like dressing up and feeling pretty, but I do know I was young, pre teen definitely. I b would always feel more comfortable hanging around girls than guys. On the other hand I like being male and have no intention on transitioning.

I think I started shaving my legs 20 maybe 30 years ago, sometimes I shave my face sometimes not, for the past 6 months I have had a mustache and goatee.

As far as feminization, that started about 20 years ago, I have had my own bras and panties for at least that long and keep a few pairs of boxers around because I like them as night shorts, but I have my fair share of female tees and shorts, my wife calls them my boody shorts

Day to day at work and out and about I present as male. But honestly I really don't think anyone cares how we dress, as long as it's not tacky. My wife on the other hand is afraid of me getting beat up or something if I went out dressed as a female, which I do on occasion if I am traveling for work.

[PerkyAcups]

Hello Perky,

Have any of you been here?  Where you able to maintain this or did your feminization continue further? What was your next steps?

I think the question of what constitutes being a "male staying male" and "transitioning" is highly individualized. Transitioning doesn't always have to be done openly. It can be done closeted/slowly for one reason or another. Likewise, a male staying male can do a lot of feminization but still live (and be happy doing so) as a male.

What you say makes a lot of sense.  Transitioning doesn't have to be done openly.  And #Vana_B, I like what you said about M to F being on a spectrum.  I don't ever see me presenting as anything other than male, but I have gone to great lengths to make my body look feminine under the clothes.  If I am honest with myself, I have done some closeted transitioning. 

y.

[PerkyAcups]

My workouts always seem to end up more about shaping than building muscle.  Even times when I think I am ready to bulk back up and get strong, once my workouts start my mind shifts to will this make my boobs look better.  Having had shoulder surgery and loss of muscle mass from not exercising I am not able to lift very heavy anymore.  I think all my workouts are toning my feminine figure. whether that is my intention or not. I kind of like that.

[PleasantlyFascinated]

I'm there too.  I'm more motivated to shape my butt, hips, thighs and chest than typical strong-guy stuff.  Consequently, I lift weights every day, and every day is some form of leg day.

[ThePantyProfessor]

What is "male" even? We atribute definitions to these titles through an arbitrary consensus the masses have decided is the definition. People still cant seperate the definition of biological sex and gender even though there has been a split in motion for many years now. In the end of the day you are whoever you decide to be no one else decides that for you.

My wife likes to put it this way, its your life customize your avitar however you want. Who cares about the labels people want to put on you. In the end of the day if you are happy and the people you cherish are unbothered nothing else matters. Wear the feminine cloths, explore your options without restrictions and find out as much about yourself as you can. 

I spent my entire life with an uncontrollable gravitation to feminine clothing, satin anything would draw me in. The softer and more feminine it was the more i was driven to it. Lived in a shame cycle because of societal expectations. Treated as though i was some kind of monster for wanting to wear these things and enjoying it.

In my mid 20s, i dated a girl who had a kink in exploiting it and humiliating me with it. While on one hand i got to do it, on the other hand the shame and embarassment was still attached. And that never quite resolved it for me.

Fast forward 10 years later, i have a wife of 7 years who openly supported whatever choice of clothing i wanted to make, 3 years straight wearing panties 90% of the time. We have matching pairs and have fun planning wearing them on the same day. I joined this group because i wanted to shape my body into a more feminine shape to fit the clothing i wanted to wear a bit better. I grew some modest breasts with PM and other herbal combinations and still managed to maintain a healthy unhindered sex life with my wife. I might not be the exact shape or form i would like to be, but my fashion choice feels more natural now. 

I wear the cloths for me so i layer pretty heavily for work so my bra does not show while i work. I didnt need one at first but now it feels weird to go without. no one seems to be any wiser to the fact that i am wearing one. And i dont really desire to advertise it to the world.

Wearing panties has allowed me to try different clothing options in my personal time as well, often at home my outfit choice is an oversized hoodie, and leggings. Its almost unfair how comfortable leggings are. I also have some satin shorts and pants that feel really great against freshly shaven legs. If you feel brave enough to explore further i would highly recomend trying it.

Womens bootcut jeans are also quite nice, and no one really notices if they are for women or men, if they fit well they just look good. Plus the tighter fit with the panties helps. You can find many ways to continue to explore if you desire to do so. At this point 60% of my wardrobe is feminine. I cant really wear feminine shirts outside of tunic types due to having a long torso, so my t shirts are mainly male. I do have some cami tunic tops that i use for layering. 

Even with all that, i still consider myself "male" even if i probably dont fit the societal definition of what it should be. Im a great husband and father, Im happy living my life the way i want to. and it soulds like you are on your way there as well. 

I would just leave you with this piece of advice,  don't hold yourself back, embrace it, explore it, and accept it. Pretty soon it wont be a marvel anymore but you simply being you, happy and unapologetic. Cookie cutter definitions can fuck right off.

[Curvyguy]

Well said professor I say the same gender isn't not black and white but a rainbow of colours be true to yourself not what society wants you to be