I believe I'm between categories 3-5. Mostly, I avoid the issues, but as soon as I'm not spinning my wheels mentally, it's right there, one way or another.
Posting on BN.
Reading on Ainterol.
Fictionmania.
Cheryl's.
Tunblrs.
Blogs.
I just can't go beyond certain levels, though. I wanted to transition from about the time I was 9-10, and I'd been crossdressing and embarrassed by my body for several years already. How many boys are envious of a girl's flat front (crotch)? Or have psuedogynecomastia so that they hold their chest when running? Wish they could wear a girl's swimsuit? Don't like the rough-and-tumble play?
I know I'm an outlier here, even, for other reasons - but I just perceive so many things I did "automatically" that imitated the girls. Carrying books, mannerisms, gestures, patterns of speech, emotional hurts, all of that stuff... I didn't intentionally pattern my behaviors on the girls, I just did things the same way. Sashaying down the hall, for instance, with hips wiggling? Walking toe to heel, which is generally how women walk (especially WRT heels)? Books against the chest, to protect breasts (which I didn't have) from impact? Envying the girls their smooth crotch while hating the fact my swimsuit clung to my little member? Felt like everyone was looking at it... Liking satin, lace, costume (meaning, historic dress), interest in corsetry, tried shaving my legs, didn't see girls as a "big deal" and yet envied them their apparent "solidarity" (sisterhood? Team Woman? Etc.) Better at talking and writing than any of the other males in the school, and weaker than all the males, too. Quiet, bookish - not boisterous, nor a trouble-maker.
So, now? Still into (video) gaming, and entertainment (movies, music) and any way to distract myself from the problem. But even at work, I'm on Susan's, Cheryl's, BN, Ainterol, etc, etc, etc, all day long. Got tumblr on the phone, and Feedly aggregates T* blogs.... I mean, it's probably hours every day, in my DISTRACTED state....
And more and more, that hurts even further....
-Jean