I'm back again.. at least for a few days or so anyway. Here is what was going on with me...
I had to have another test on my heart. Ended up being fine and the cardiac specialist said my heart is in excellent shape. That's good, and encouraging considering I have had 3 heart attacks. But prior to (and for several days after) the test I dove into a severe depression and was struggling with it and a really heavy bout of GD. It was pretty bad (the GD). Couple that with the depression and I wasn't in a very good place at all.
I managed not to do anything insanely stupid like castrate myself etc but I won't deny the struggle not to was almost lost. I'm still depressed and I am still going through a deep bout of GD (more than my 'normal' level of constant GD) so things are only 'ok' with me right now. I'm not really back so much as checking in.... yeah it's hard to stay away from here.
~E