15-07-2015, 03:23 AM
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15-07-2015, 04:37 AM
15-07-2015, 04:45 PM
(13-07-2015, 04:49 AM)Lotus Wrote: Hello to all:
I'd like to address an issue that I think is disrupting the forum, the attitude of mistrust between transwomen and non-trans men at Breast Nexus. Ironically, we are so far removed from talking about growing breast it's not even funny. When males seeking breast growth start at Breast Nexus they most likely will start with NBE, at some point one might decide NBE isn't enough and choose on transitioning. Prior to all that, using all the NBE tools here at BN including communicating with other (non-trans) men are deemed acceptable.
Well I always wanted more that just tits, I wanted feminization.... curves, reduced body hair, and relief from high levels of T.... While I think its possible there are men here that want an otherwise totally masculine body with feminine breasts I don't see many hairy chests in the picture section LOL.... Im sure for some it IS a "fetish" or whatever negative connotation you want to call it... I think this place is a great resource and support site for men or "men" who have a feminine side....
Quote:When does it becomes unacceptable to associate with men seeking breast growth after deciding on transition?, why then do they become the ones with the fetish. There's no existing "code of conduct" that communicating with other non-trans men will infect the well-being of being trans, (come on, that's nonsense) testosterone won't rub off or transfer telepathically. We can't let the fears or transphobia (yes, even from other trans) of a few dictate the flow of the forum.
I think its because once you decide to jump the fence for good, come out to the world as a woman and go at it full speed with everything you have including surgerys, living full time as a female ect.... Well Id say it's natural to want to totally reject masculinity... I know for me at first I went a bit overboard and I have the pics (wince) to prove it Many Im sure don't want to remember when THEY were in between and living with what at the time probably felt like some weird guilty shameful fetish or kink... I know it took me a LONG time to get past the idea that it was all just a fetish for myself....
I think a lot of TS women, especially those who transition later in life distort their own past narrative a bit.... I mean they become obsessed with proving to the world and themselves they are really women, "passing", "stealth", ect.... So they tend to not mention the fact they might have used to like watching sports, big V8's, hot rods, beer, shiny tools, guns, and other boy toys ect... I know for me there was a period where I just wanted it ALL gone, even considered trading out my male pit bull for a freaking cat LOL... It's taken some time but I now know its a good thing I can still do a brake job on my Jeep and it's even fun to play "dumb girl" at the parts counter with the guy trying to up sell me parts and telling him "My BF said just get the cheap brake pads and a hardware kit"... "Ahh Im sure he knows what he's doing" knowing I could totally take the guy to school regarding auto mechanics Hell I've even started drinking a cheap cold beer or two now and then
Quote:I support BOTH sides because I am BOTH sides, I am male, and I am transgendered female, which means I am gender fluid. Only, I identify more as male, even though my body says I'm more female........which is my goal.
I never could find peace with the idea of living in between, for me again it was all or nothing... BUT as things move along like I said I've somehow found peace with the old "male" parts of me Thing is I need to COMPLETELY transition physically and socially... But that's just me, I fully support anyone who wants to bend or blend the gender norms to whatever extent they are comfortable with and "Fuck Society"
Quote:Some non-trans see "trans-supremacy" being forced upon them and the forum, whether it's intentional or not it can cause some friction with non-trans men, I can understand that. I can also understand that transwomen might be feeling excluded from the rest of the forum. And, I can even understand that the genetic girls here can take exception to all the fuss on this side of the forum. Emotions are running high, regardless of that, the forum is open to all sides.
I used to be OK with "trans woman" but Im not anymore... Im just a woman who can't have kids with the wrong anatomy at birth.... I don't even like "genetic girls", there are fully reproductive XY "females" after all, chromosomes have nothing to do with it... Ive come to the conclusion that across the entire TG spectrum, "MtF and FtM" that its an "intersexed" condition thats not yet fully understood... Whatever it's just a part of the human condition, always has been and always will be...
All that said I at least can still identify with "men who want tits" or whatever... Im just happy people are free to be themselves here and there should be no casting judgement on anyone whoever they are....
Quote:No conspiracy exists, no lines to be drawn, no battle to be fought or won (we create the drama in our own minds). The forum will not be divided/split, it won't lean trans or non-trans, it's middle ground. First and foremost, it's for supporting breast growth. (Who am I to say all this?, nobody special, just a friend to the forum).
SO while Im way beyond just "breast growth" and NBE and sometimes feel like I don't really fit in here, I still like to come here and relate my experience as a transitioned female and give support to anyone wanting titties for whatever reason
15-07-2015, 05:15 PM
Very well put together and I have to add, a rational thought. It sort of goes along with my analogy of ex-smoker's and smoker's, but told from a " I have been there side of things.". Thank you. It's too bad there is such a period of adjustment that render's some people immature and so negative at that time.
15-07-2015, 05:42 PM
Well thanks I'll admit your "EX Smoker" comment kind of rubbed me the wrong way but once I began thinking of a reply to it I guess I couldn't come up with anything
Eva, I love you're response.......course I love all the other responses too, they have such flavor...... such intellect......and such brutal humor.
this paragraph is very interesting:
Who here can deny can their first V8?, lmao... , shit....give me back the ponies!.... family sedans suck!!!! can you say Clark Griswald lmao.
Yeah, imo I believe this......one doesn't have to take pharma, wear a dress, wig, make or act prim and proper to be TG. TG is a state of mind, I don't care if I had a flippin gene at birth or a larger digit to tell me why or when I felt TG......I also don't need the defined medical version of where I fit on the gender space time continuum, lol I know the difference....please.
Frankly, I get so tired of how hearing how one side is more TG then the other. If I have to hear I need to find my true self one more time I'm going to barf......
Come on people, time to shed the red tape......the high court finally gave way to inequality, time we as humans free our minds from the inequality of gender definitions. I could be both genders if I so choose, would it shock anyone one here if I said I was on hrt longer than most TG's here?, and if that was true why would I still have no desire for all things girly. Honestly, I can't pretend to present *En femme*, imo I'd be living a lie. I think we have more people that might feel this same way here at BN then we know about, time we gave some recognition to these individuals. I believe you could see variations of this version too, so who knows anymore, nothing is set in stone, it's all relative.
Btw Eva, imo your genuine, and that's from the time your were LittleMiss to the present day "Eva, the Bad-Ass Chick". You went from all things "the dude", to most things "cool chick" (don't change a bit).
Sheesh, I need to stop being so social these days lmao, I haven't talked breast science in ages...., (note to self, find the nearest abstract regarding clinical research to feel better about self).
this paragraph is very interesting:
(15-07-2015, 04:45 PM)EvaMarie Wrote: I think a lot of TS women, especially those who transition later in life distort their own past narrative a bit.... I mean they become obsessed with proving to the world and themselves they are really women, "passing", "stealth", ect.... So they tend to not mention the fact they might have used to like watching sports, big V8's, hot rods, beer, shiny tools, guns, and other boy toys ect...
Who here can deny can their first V8?, lmao... , shit....give me back the ponies!.... family sedans suck!!!! can you say Clark Griswald lmao.
Yeah, imo I believe this......one doesn't have to take pharma, wear a dress, wig, make or act prim and proper to be TG. TG is a state of mind, I don't care if I had a flippin gene at birth or a larger digit to tell me why or when I felt TG......I also don't need the defined medical version of where I fit on the gender space time continuum, lol I know the difference....please.
Frankly, I get so tired of how hearing how one side is more TG then the other. If I have to hear I need to find my true self one more time I'm going to barf......
Come on people, time to shed the red tape......the high court finally gave way to inequality, time we as humans free our minds from the inequality of gender definitions. I could be both genders if I so choose, would it shock anyone one here if I said I was on hrt longer than most TG's here?, and if that was true why would I still have no desire for all things girly. Honestly, I can't pretend to present *En femme*, imo I'd be living a lie. I think we have more people that might feel this same way here at BN then we know about, time we gave some recognition to these individuals. I believe you could see variations of this version too, so who knows anymore, nothing is set in stone, it's all relative.
Btw Eva, imo your genuine, and that's from the time your were LittleMiss to the present day "Eva, the Bad-Ass Chick". You went from all things "the dude", to most things "cool chick" (don't change a bit).
Sheesh, I need to stop being so social these days lmao, I haven't talked breast science in ages...., (note to self, find the nearest abstract regarding clinical research to feel better about self).
16-07-2015, 06:34 AM
I can't let this go. I must say something. Mayo on hot dogs is an absolute travesty worse than hot sauerkraut!
I am one of those guys who sits somewhere in the middle. I want breasts, and I'm working on growing them. I am sort of gender fluid. On any given day, I might be wearing any combination of clothing associated with either gender, but I present as male when outside my house, though I can make a semi-attractive female with a little work. What I have found over the years is that people who transition tend to be very black and white in their view of gender. To them, it is binary. One is either male or female. It is similar to gays and lesbians not understanding how a person can be bisexual. To them, one is either gay/lesbian or straight. There is no in-between. Those who claim to be bi are just testing the waters or sight seeing, afraid to commit, afraid of being outed. Certainly, each generation gets less and less entrenched in this belief system, perhaps because all those others fought so hard to make it possible for them to just be themselves, and perhaps it is that struggle that causes those folks to be so entrenched in a binary, black/white paradigm.
I honestly don't have any skin in someone else's game. What others choose or need to do to be comfortable in their own skin is their business, even when they choose to share with others. The only issue I have is that for a while the male portion of the forum was almost exclusively devoted to transition, and I can't identify with that so I generally withdrew because I had nothing to contribute. I also didn't really have a lot of time to spend on this site, not that I have much more time these days, but I do lurk a little from time to time.
So, there's my two cents. If you're offended, I blow my nose at you, and I wave my private parts at your aunties.
I am one of those guys who sits somewhere in the middle. I want breasts, and I'm working on growing them. I am sort of gender fluid. On any given day, I might be wearing any combination of clothing associated with either gender, but I present as male when outside my house, though I can make a semi-attractive female with a little work. What I have found over the years is that people who transition tend to be very black and white in their view of gender. To them, it is binary. One is either male or female. It is similar to gays and lesbians not understanding how a person can be bisexual. To them, one is either gay/lesbian or straight. There is no in-between. Those who claim to be bi are just testing the waters or sight seeing, afraid to commit, afraid of being outed. Certainly, each generation gets less and less entrenched in this belief system, perhaps because all those others fought so hard to make it possible for them to just be themselves, and perhaps it is that struggle that causes those folks to be so entrenched in a binary, black/white paradigm.
I honestly don't have any skin in someone else's game. What others choose or need to do to be comfortable in their own skin is their business, even when they choose to share with others. The only issue I have is that for a while the male portion of the forum was almost exclusively devoted to transition, and I can't identify with that so I generally withdrew because I had nothing to contribute. I also didn't really have a lot of time to spend on this site, not that I have much more time these days, but I do lurk a little from time to time.
So, there's my two cents. If you're offended, I blow my nose at you, and I wave my private parts at your aunties.
16-07-2015, 02:14 PM
(14-07-2015, 01:06 AM)ElainMoria Wrote: *growls madly* Respect mah authoratah! You will not be a cis man with boobs! You will be a transgender woman and that is all there is too it!! There is no grey line. There is no cover for you.. there is no..... ....... ......
Wait what?
Seriously folks. When I came to BN... I was dealing with pretty severe dysphoria. I saw BN as a way to start the process of transition for me though admittedly at the time I didn't exactly know that as I do now (yes I was fooling myself initially and pretending I just wanted boobs). However as time progressed I realized that my inner intent that I had sublimated and found a soft outlet here was to go much further than just growing breasts. That MY intent was full transition.
However for myself..... I only came to the conscious realization of that after being here for a short while and then I made the choice to switch to synthetics rather than herbals. That was just MY choice. BN gave me the chance to explore my own feelings on the subject that I had hidden even from myself. For that alone I will be ever grateful to those who created and run this forum. Had it not been for BN I wouldn't have been able to come to terms with and accept the real me. So there is that...
BN provided me with a massive amount of information and resources that allowed me to make an informed choice. For me that was the choice to go all the way through and transition. For others here, they never experience the thought or desire to go through transition and simply seek to develop and enhance breast growth (for whatever reason). To me it's kinda like this.
Some people love to swim in the local lake, they dive right in, go to the deepest parts of water, swim around and have an awesome time. Some people love the water in the lake as well. They enjoy being around it, like to wade around on the edges, maybe take a quick dip where the water isn't real deep. Others start off just wading around and enjoying the cool refreshing awesomeness of the water but soon find they need something more. They decide to swim out with the other swimmers in the really deep waters. There are also those who start off wading around the edges of the water but for one reason or another decide they would rather stay up on the beach and out of the water all together. All parties have a great time doing what they like and everybody gets to enjoy the wonderfulness of the lake and it's immediate surrounds.
I see this much the same way as my example above. I don't understand why anybody would make an issue of another persons choices and journey. It's not your life or choice to make it's their own. Just enjoy the area. Be happy there is enough room for everyone. Quit yer bitchin.
And damnit.... Respect Mah Authoratah!!!!! (or I will get my Cat-O-Nine-Tails out and beat you with it till you beg me to keep going).
~Elain
I love it, nice example ...
16-07-2015, 03:40 PM
It's really too bad, that after things come to a head, that this kind of acceptance or self filtering didn't appear before.
The good thing is that if a guy who is experimenting, or KNOWS he only wants breast and not give totally up being a male can find info or a roadmap to follow to get info in one section.
I think having a bio male section is super for the same reason but having a more specific section just fine tunes it.
Some great perspectives and thoughts have occurred on this thread, as well as being respectful of everyone else's thoughts a feelings.
Cudo's.
The good thing is that if a guy who is experimenting, or KNOWS he only wants breast and not give totally up being a male can find info or a roadmap to follow to get info in one section.
I think having a bio male section is super for the same reason but having a more specific section just fine tunes it.
Some great perspectives and thoughts have occurred on this thread, as well as being respectful of everyone else's thoughts a feelings.
Cudo's.
16-07-2015, 08:31 PM
(16-07-2015, 03:40 PM)iaboy Wrote:Quote:It's really too bad, that after things come to a head, that this kind of acceptance or self filtering didn't appear before.
This is true iaboy, maybe a new awakening is stirring atm.
[quote='MonikaT' pid='155471' dateline='1437024882']
The only issue I have is that for a while the male portion of the forum was almost exclusively devoted to transition, and I can't identify with that so I generally withdrew because I had nothing to contribute
Hi Monika, nice to hear from you.
I can understand your feelings about withdrawing from BN in light of the direction. What can you say really?, some people talk more than others. lol that's me too though.
Personally, I enjoy your feedback.
Edit: spanky I'm so sorry I forget to thank you, (me saying thanks my friend) , also.....thanks to all other contributors. Btw, lol thanks Elaine "respect mah authoritah!"
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