23-08-2013, 05:32 PM
It’s been on my mind a lot lately about how I’m going to deal with family and friends when they start noticing the changes I’m making. Here’s a little background:
I’ve done an exceptionally good job of hiding my true self from my family and friends. In fact, until I recently disclosed everything to my wife, I was pretty successful at hiding it from her for as long as she's known me. I have always tried very hard to maintain the male look and persona that I was "supposed" to portray. Meaning, I've always had short hair, dressed in only drab colors, no ear rings, did "guy" things and obviously never did anything to bolster my chest. I live in a very conservative environment and have tight family ties on every side. Aside from my wife who now knows everything and the extent to which I have suffered and concealed my gender issues, everyone thinks I’m a perfectly well adjusted male who is as happy as the next guy. My wife is aware of the long term effects of PM usage and that I’m now growing out my hair but to everyone else, long hair and or breasts is going to be a pretty big shocker, especially on me.
While I’m safely under the RADAR right now, it’s inevitable that someone is going to notice at some point. First the hair will raise some red flags about me becoming a little too feminine but I think I can get through that on my own. I already have a couple excuses in mind - mid life crisis, grow it while I still can, Jesus had long hair etc. But what I’m really worried about is what comes next. On the heels of growing my hair out come breasts! The hair will likely raise suspicions which will pique my family’s paranoia but when it’s followed by boobs popping out, their suspicions will be confirmed! If someone gets the notion that I’m transsexual or homosexual, the poop will really hit the fan. None of them have ever (knowingly) encountered someone like me and to realize that I’m “one of them” would rock their world to say the least. The thing is, I’ve been suffocating this desire my whole life and only in recent months, have I finally taken a life-saving, single gasp of air. If I try to stuff this back underwater, I’ll surely drown. I have to persevere to the end no matter what awaits me.
So, does anyone have any profound ways of dealing with what lies ahead for me? Any success stories that you have from traveling this road I must go down? Any regrets you had that you’d caution me to avoid? …Blowing them off or making snarky remarks isn’t an option for me. I know I have at least a year or two before the breasts become obvious and perhaps there will be enough time between the hair and the breasts that it wont be quite as big of an issue as I fear it might be. Nonetheless, I want to start thinking about the conversations and "corrective" pressures others in my life will likely employ so when they happen, I'll be more prepared and self confident than they and will, hopefully, be able to gently help them understand and accept what I'm doing. Please, don't be shy.
I’ve done an exceptionally good job of hiding my true self from my family and friends. In fact, until I recently disclosed everything to my wife, I was pretty successful at hiding it from her for as long as she's known me. I have always tried very hard to maintain the male look and persona that I was "supposed" to portray. Meaning, I've always had short hair, dressed in only drab colors, no ear rings, did "guy" things and obviously never did anything to bolster my chest. I live in a very conservative environment and have tight family ties on every side. Aside from my wife who now knows everything and the extent to which I have suffered and concealed my gender issues, everyone thinks I’m a perfectly well adjusted male who is as happy as the next guy. My wife is aware of the long term effects of PM usage and that I’m now growing out my hair but to everyone else, long hair and or breasts is going to be a pretty big shocker, especially on me.
While I’m safely under the RADAR right now, it’s inevitable that someone is going to notice at some point. First the hair will raise some red flags about me becoming a little too feminine but I think I can get through that on my own. I already have a couple excuses in mind - mid life crisis, grow it while I still can, Jesus had long hair etc. But what I’m really worried about is what comes next. On the heels of growing my hair out come breasts! The hair will likely raise suspicions which will pique my family’s paranoia but when it’s followed by boobs popping out, their suspicions will be confirmed! If someone gets the notion that I’m transsexual or homosexual, the poop will really hit the fan. None of them have ever (knowingly) encountered someone like me and to realize that I’m “one of them” would rock their world to say the least. The thing is, I’ve been suffocating this desire my whole life and only in recent months, have I finally taken a life-saving, single gasp of air. If I try to stuff this back underwater, I’ll surely drown. I have to persevere to the end no matter what awaits me.
So, does anyone have any profound ways of dealing with what lies ahead for me? Any success stories that you have from traveling this road I must go down? Any regrets you had that you’d caution me to avoid? …Blowing them off or making snarky remarks isn’t an option for me. I know I have at least a year or two before the breasts become obvious and perhaps there will be enough time between the hair and the breasts that it wont be quite as big of an issue as I fear it might be. Nonetheless, I want to start thinking about the conversations and "corrective" pressures others in my life will likely employ so when they happen, I'll be more prepared and self confident than they and will, hopefully, be able to gently help them understand and accept what I'm doing. Please, don't be shy.