Thank you flamesabers I did feel better. I do feel better.
However Since I have come out about having gender issues to two people now, that supports me whatever happens, I have had a some brief mental relief. I have been reading a little about HRT that made me question yet again if full transition is what I want. My life situation does seem to have built up to this moment where I now stand, in a fairly good position to make a life changing decision for myself. I am trying not to rush it, to get it right.
I wonder what you guys think of this brain rewiring topic that has been discussed here. I think about it when I doubt. Is it even possible, given that this phenomena exists, to experience it after only 4 weeks of PM on a dose of 1000mg a day?
This week I have not been able to keep myself from crossdressing a single day. I am closing in on 2 weeks off of PM.
I would also like to touch on the subject of my sexual capability, whoever might be interested... I have had some concerns over my non existing erections while on PM, and my failure to ejaculate even after I stopped taking it. The main reason being impatience and lack of motivation to 'finish the task' at hand. Recently I have kind of felt like arousal alone is enough, i don't 'need' to finish. In the right circumstances I get very aroused, I feel happy and pretty, I get a strange tingling in my belly and after some time I am filled with endorphins to the extent that ejaculation doesn't really matter, I feel good anyway.
So today I managed to ejaculate for the first time in 2 weeks. It was nice to know I am sill 'working' down there but the experience in itself disappointed me, I had expected it to be better just considering the amount of time that had passed.
I feel that this whole ordeal has definitely changed my idea of sex and how I experience it. Could it be a purely physical effect of the PM or has it caused me to opened up doors in my psyche that where previously blocked by denial? Any comments on this?
However Since I have come out about having gender issues to two people now, that supports me whatever happens, I have had a some brief mental relief. I have been reading a little about HRT that made me question yet again if full transition is what I want. My life situation does seem to have built up to this moment where I now stand, in a fairly good position to make a life changing decision for myself. I am trying not to rush it, to get it right.
I wonder what you guys think of this brain rewiring topic that has been discussed here. I think about it when I doubt. Is it even possible, given that this phenomena exists, to experience it after only 4 weeks of PM on a dose of 1000mg a day?
This week I have not been able to keep myself from crossdressing a single day. I am closing in on 2 weeks off of PM.
I would also like to touch on the subject of my sexual capability, whoever might be interested... I have had some concerns over my non existing erections while on PM, and my failure to ejaculate even after I stopped taking it. The main reason being impatience and lack of motivation to 'finish the task' at hand. Recently I have kind of felt like arousal alone is enough, i don't 'need' to finish. In the right circumstances I get very aroused, I feel happy and pretty, I get a strange tingling in my belly and after some time I am filled with endorphins to the extent that ejaculation doesn't really matter, I feel good anyway.
So today I managed to ejaculate for the first time in 2 weeks. It was nice to know I am sill 'working' down there but the experience in itself disappointed me, I had expected it to be better just considering the amount of time that had passed.
I feel that this whole ordeal has definitely changed my idea of sex and how I experience it. Could it be a purely physical effect of the PM or has it caused me to opened up doors in my psyche that where previously blocked by denial? Any comments on this?