[bryony]

Hi Bryony,
Well said, thank you.

You're welcome!

Although I identify myself as being NOT TS, I have been disappointed that my need to cross-dress has evaporated now that I actually have something to give the right shape to female clothes.

Are you sure you're not? That response is classic TS, and your finger digit ratio, although the mean for males, is still within the lower 25% of females according to the Normal Percentile Calculator

It could be that you got more prenatal androgen than I did, but less than most males. A "normal" male would experience anxiety taking feminising doses, like I do without it. Chrissie is definitely right about embracing your condition - now that I can accept what I am, it's even more of a relief than taking hormones alone. It's just the external guise to the world theme that is an issue for debate.

Also, why be disappointed? Why not be happy that something that was controlling you against your will is now something that you can control yourself, and still enjoy if you want to?

Imagine this: (it's not a bad analogy) You are addicted to crack cocaine.
A scientist discovers a drug that totally removes your physical and psychological dependence on it, and thereafter you are now free to take it or leave it. It becomes an enjoyable experience that you can indulge in after dinner or not as you wish, and you don't get a compulsion to rush out to a toilet for a fix anymore. Which would you prefer?

However looking into myself more deeply I have recently been able to put things into perspective, and although I have lost the NEED to CROSS-DRESS, I have not lost the pleasure of wearing 'female' clothing, it just no longer feels like 'female' clothing, just 'clothing'.

So what's the problem?
I know I would thoroughly enjoy it if I didn't feel self-conscious about other people! (which unfortunately includes my critical eye!)

Honestly, you may as well identify as TS. It really is a relief. Embrace it as one of life's conditions to deal with... which you are, and it gives me great hope!

B. x