[Kay Lady]

I meditate everyday. For the last few years while meditating, I picture myself as the woman I want to be. I have been taking NBE supplements for 4 years, so it is hard to say that visualizing changed my body. I do believe that visualizing has helped me accept myself as that has been a difficult part of my journey. I carry a lot of guilt and shame about who I am. I would love to transition completely but, the fallout and loss would be great. I have opened the closet door, told others that I can trust, grown my hair out, pierced my ears and taken NBE. Long ago I purged my women's clothes a few times. Since meditating - visualizing, I have not purged and I consider transitioning more often. Will I? Time will tell. This journey has been healing of some very old wounds and finding my true feminine  essence. And meditation has been a huge part of it. I feel deep down that something big is in my future, like a door will open and I will walk through it completely changing my life.