So recently as I began a new feminization routine, my wonderful girlfriend has turned irate once again at the growth of my chest and appearance of my figure.
I was very honest and explained my desires to grow breast do not outweigh my love for her, yet they outweigh her love for me. For a couple of years she has been along this ride of seeing me consume phyto-estrogens and having breakdowns from my actions, and subsequently causing me to purging and stop for a few months. This then would always led me to resuming my actions, behind her back of course but then to be discovered at inopportune times. Lets just say its been a bit of a rocky road but we have enjoyed many adventures together and spend almost all hours of the day together. She has also stalked my phone on multiple occasion and actually found this site but not my profile. At times I know she is being very intrusive but at the same time my inability to express honesty to her has certainly caused a rift, that allows me to accept her actions towards me. I know I can certainty live without fully feminizing my exterior, but her lack of care to the fact I wish to engage in gender promiscuity coupled with it scares the living shit out of her, causes a dissociation with loving her in a complete way. I fully expect replies, if any to be of the flavor of "find someone else" but the magic and love we do share beyond my fixation with feminization is magnanimous, and we make an amazing team as-well as our love making.
Inputs are welcome, but I am merely putting on display; that if one does not be honest with a partner you can end up in my situation. When we met she knew I was full blown transgender but cut back and halted due to feeling tired and having a huge hormonal imbalance due to taking to much Glandular Pills aka Palumboism, which has now completely vanished. I was also taking androcur at the time. Just to much at once.. She convinced me I'm fetishizing gender transition, and that all the men I slept with and experiences I had were just a kink, that I look better being my masculine self of which then I decided to continue to reroute back to my masculinity.
Yet.. something always pulled me back...
The hard thing for me is that I truly do doubt if I really want to go as far as I really want too. I know many here struggle with the same. I know I can explode my breasts in a 4 month period and pass out in public no problem, but do I really want to give up a love so pure and so natural, with such a beautiful woman? Is it all I'm building it up to be? I know its hard to express all the angles of a situation to a crowd of strangers, to even have them understand a glimpse of what I speak about, but its a good outlet for someone like me and I like to associate my struggles to others.
Thanks for reading.
I'm just tired of stopping and starting, its not like NBE is cheap....
I was very honest and explained my desires to grow breast do not outweigh my love for her, yet they outweigh her love for me. For a couple of years she has been along this ride of seeing me consume phyto-estrogens and having breakdowns from my actions, and subsequently causing me to purging and stop for a few months. This then would always led me to resuming my actions, behind her back of course but then to be discovered at inopportune times. Lets just say its been a bit of a rocky road but we have enjoyed many adventures together and spend almost all hours of the day together. She has also stalked my phone on multiple occasion and actually found this site but not my profile. At times I know she is being very intrusive but at the same time my inability to express honesty to her has certainly caused a rift, that allows me to accept her actions towards me. I know I can certainty live without fully feminizing my exterior, but her lack of care to the fact I wish to engage in gender promiscuity coupled with it scares the living shit out of her, causes a dissociation with loving her in a complete way. I fully expect replies, if any to be of the flavor of "find someone else" but the magic and love we do share beyond my fixation with feminization is magnanimous, and we make an amazing team as-well as our love making.
Inputs are welcome, but I am merely putting on display; that if one does not be honest with a partner you can end up in my situation. When we met she knew I was full blown transgender but cut back and halted due to feeling tired and having a huge hormonal imbalance due to taking to much Glandular Pills aka Palumboism, which has now completely vanished. I was also taking androcur at the time. Just to much at once.. She convinced me I'm fetishizing gender transition, and that all the men I slept with and experiences I had were just a kink, that I look better being my masculine self of which then I decided to continue to reroute back to my masculinity.
Yet.. something always pulled me back...
The hard thing for me is that I truly do doubt if I really want to go as far as I really want too. I know many here struggle with the same. I know I can explode my breasts in a 4 month period and pass out in public no problem, but do I really want to give up a love so pure and so natural, with such a beautiful woman? Is it all I'm building it up to be? I know its hard to express all the angles of a situation to a crowd of strangers, to even have them understand a glimpse of what I speak about, but its a good outlet for someone like me and I like to associate my struggles to others.
Thanks for reading.
I'm just tired of stopping and starting, its not like NBE is cheap....