[Nightshade]

I have heard that it lowers T, and that`s why men are not allowed sex before certain sports events, Lower T = Lower aggression.
I`m really concerned that you would be worried about your mail being opened? it is Ilegal to open or tamper with someone elses mail, despite the fact it`s just downright rude and disrespectful.

Yes, you should Totally get yourself a vibrator, or even several! all us girls need a friend (or 2)  
most places will always send them in discreet packaging with no hint of what`s inside.
It`s very likely that when you go on propper HRT at a transition dose (this will include blockers) that function will cease fairly quickly and things will shrink too, in time there will also be no, how shall we say... "Evidence" that you`ve "Completed" (unless you`re noisey LOL).
You`ll retain the ability to orgasm and they get Waaaaay! better they won`t be as "messy" if at all. you Will need to aquire a different mindset though as the process of reaching orgasm and the feelings involved are different from T fueled "male" type orgasms, they take a little longer and distractions can kill the buildup pretty easy too, but they`re Soooo much more worth it in the end!
You`ll probably lose most of your interest in pron as well, or it will take a shift to something with more of a story or a romance element involved.

You`re a grown adult! order a damn toy, and if they open it then it serves them right for being so F**king nosey! don`t Ever be made to feel ashamed for having a healthy sex drive, Own that shit!

It's not as bad as it sounds. I order food and supplements for my parents so certain packages they open. I have ordered some from Amazon recently and they haven't opened any, but it's still possible they open in by accident. IIRC My mom opened one from Walgreens recently and that's one of the places I might order it from.

I just read something about orgasms releasing prolactin so maybe it is a good thing to masturbate?

I'm actually hoping to start out on just Finasteride and estrogen rather than taking a T blocker. I have health issues and lowering T too much might not be good. If I don't get any results then maybe I'll reconsider. This is all hoping that the doc will go along with this.

Yeah. I'm looking forward to that. I read in "Whipping Girl" about orgasms changing after HRT

While the quantity of my sexual experiences has decreased significantly, the quality of those
experiences has increased exponentially. Indeed, I called this chapter “Boygasms and Girlgasms”
because, for me, the differences in how my body responds to sexual stimuli—how I “get off,” if you
will—has been the most dramatic (and in many ways most enjoyable) hormonal change that I’ve
experienced. I began to notice these changes within the first few weeks of starting hormone therapy.
Even before I lost the ability to maintain erections, I found that what used to excite me—that back-
and-forth stroking action that males typically prefer—really wasn’t doing the trick anymore. I just felt
like I needed something more. So I started experimenting with Dani’s vibrators. When I had tried
them in the past, they always felt like too much stimulation, but now they suddenly felt absolutely
incredible. And back when I was hormonally male, sexual stimulation would cause me to climb rather
rapidly toward the peak of orgasm; if I wanted the experience to last longer, I had to keep pulling
back just before I hit that precipice. But now I found that I could go way beyond what used to be the
point of orgasm, writhing for fifteen minutes in a sexual state that was far more intense than I had ever
experienced before. Now, my orgasms are way more in the female rather than male range: They
typically take longer to achieve (but are well worth the wait), each one has a different flavor and
intensity, they are less centralized and more diffuse throughout my body, and they are often multiple.