(16-08-2016, 10:07 AM)oki Wrote: A few notes regarding a break from E and AAs:
I stupidly stopped cold turkey and got rewarded by four days of headache (right before it subsided it was the worst I ever had). 17 days in traces of growth pains still linger but volume loss is disheartening. I'd say about last two months' gains are lost. That doesn't worry me much, it'll be back soon upon restarting the routine. Other than that no significant changes.

Yes, I've also found that sudden changes in dosage either up or dawn causes me to feel miserable. Not only headache, but also dizziness and fatigue. For me the minimal interval between 500 mg dose change of PM is 3 days.

(16-08-2016, 10:07 AM)oki Wrote:

(10-08-2016, 02:43 PM)jannet.duff Wrote: I would say your going to be a big girl.

Now reading this made me shiver a little inside. Mmm.

So let me add something: I think that with your frame and if you stick to your routine, you will make quite an attractive girl.

(16-08-2016, 10:07 AM)oki Wrote: Made me think. Upon reflection I see did not express myself clearly. Full-fledged transition is as of now sort of a beacon beyond the horizon, showing the general way. I'll go in that direction and stop when I feel like it, not obsessing about reaching the destination. On the other hand, self-induced suppression is an unlikely (im)possibility. So I see myself going the middle way. Rather vague "passable TS" should in fact mean something like "femmy queer whom even an open-minded heterosexual man might be interested in". Again, middle road. There are no imperatives... Instead there is rejection of convenction and ingrained expectations while asking myself: "What do I genuinely want? Is it within my reach? Can I get away with it?". The third one is a big unknown. Just a matter of time before powers-that-be try to put one right, right?

I think I understand. My original idea about myself was very similar to yours. I feel that I have to project my slowly building feminine persona somewhere. However, full transition would make my life really complicated. It appears that solution is either partial feminine presentation full time or full feminine presentation part time (for example during weekends or in among friends or like-minded people). But to tell you the truth I am really not able to imagine how it could work here... Still, I am not going to give up!

(16-08-2016, 10:07 AM)oki Wrote: When I feel like I can take some attention I do some or all of these (small things by themselves, but cumulative effect sends a clear message):
I wear women's s shorts and jeans. Short and tight (men's) T-shirts that make the breasts truly peek out (which is a bit over the top but kinda turns me on). Inconspicuous necklace and bracelet. I used to have really long & somewhat pointy nails with milky polish on them. That was definitely over the top and I had quite a love/disgust relationship with them. They provoked some comments and many-a stare. Got rid of them a month ago. Wore a women's perfume for some time (Oriflame's Mirage to be specific), not anymore.
Plus the face... if I just wash the hair, shave and smile, it's startlingly feminine. Part PM, two parts plain luck. I feel I can't even get the hair styled in some fashionable manner or eyebrows trimmed or wear rings because I wouldn't pass even for a misguided, funny-looking male.
Well, what do you do, Poly?

Oh wow, there are a lot of things you do! Well, besides trying to grow more feminine breasts and exercising/diet plan to get more feminine physique I don't do that much:

I grew my hair which caused a lot of comments from colleagues. I need to have my hair cut a little bit, but I am afraid to ask for a haircut that can appear more feminine when I need it. I keep my eyebrows trimmed - it is really easy, because my eyebrows are naturally thin. I have longer fingernails and I wear translucent inconspicuous nail-polish all the time. Again, people commented about the length of my fingernails, I am usually able to dodge it by saying it is because I train martial arts (Eagle claw ). From time to time I wear women's perfume (for example Bottega Veneta Veneta). I wear only women's clothes while at home. And that's it... Oh, I've almost forgot that my girlfriend noticed my mannerism begins to be more and more feminine. Sometimes she has to remind me not to behave that way. And for the future, I am determined to start laser hair removal later this year... But I don't know if I won't chicken out.

Poly