[undecided]

Today I had an appointment with my doctor and broached the subject of my Gender Dysphoria ( GD ) with him. On the surface he was not freaked out. I take that as a good sign. However, he refused to prescribe any medications because he doesn't know a great deal on the subject and would like time to do some research on it. I understand that and respect his position but at the same time I feel like crying.

I asked him to at least prescribe a testosterone blocker like Spironolactone because I can't stand the thought of testosterone still raging through my body and he refused to do that as well until he has a better understanding of GD. I did warn him that I fully intend to start HRT as soon as possible and that I would do so even if he was not comfortable with it, up to and including buying the medications online and bypassing him all together. I made it very clear that I prefer to work within the medical system but have no issue in self medicating if I have too.

He said he has no problem in prescribing the medications I need, but that he wants to research the issue so HE has a clear understanding on what to expect, what to look for in tests, how frequently tests need to be ran, what type of tests need to be ran, what are correct dosages for safe transition medications etc.

I really DO understand where he is coming from. He wants to ensure the best possible care for me during the process so wants to be knowledgeable on it. I get that. I really do. At the same time I am screaming inside because I want to get this started yesterday. I'm 50, time is ticking. I can't keep living like this. *screams*

Patience has never been one of my virtues when I have decided to do something, and I have NEVER in my life been more determined to do something, than I am now. I don't want to wait. I really would like to do this sooner rather than later. Like yesterday, or the day before.

~Elain

I was looking through last years calander its been almost 12 months since I had my doctors visit. I hope yours ends up fairing better than mine, I'm still waiting for the appointment with a specialist who is familiar with my problem.