[Blondie14]

I'm actually naturally pretty masculine like I like typical masculine stuff and most of my friends are guys. Honest truth is though being inbetween it really is a problem. Because as I started puberty socially among most guys I'm obviously not physically the same but I'm supposed to be and it causes unwanted sexual attention to me. It also makes me self conscious because I like how I am built but it's just I know I don't look like a guy. It's like making a girl live her life as a guy making her wear clothing a guy wears traditionally. Most would still know it was a girl. I feel like that's where I'm at. I don't really feel it's appropriate to be a male this way and I like my body the way it is. I just wish I didn't have to take T to have that body shape.

Blondie14, honey, here's my story to share with you, I'm not intersex, so I may never really know how you feel... but when I was younger, I really wanted to be a boy. I hated how the world was like "girls can't do this, girls can't do that, it's inappropriate for a girl to do this and that" and when a boy does it, IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL. I felt that life was unfair, I wasn't allowed to do the things I love because apparently "girls do NOT do that!".

But now I'm 21, I've gone through more ups and downs of life, and look at where I am now! An NBE forum! Ahahaha. I learnt to love my body and make it better, instead of trying to force myself into something I wasn't, just so that society stops getting in my way. NEVER do that. Just because the society is like "striped leggings suck" and you LOVE striped leggings, it doesn't mean you're not allowed to wear them right? That was a lame example, haha. Anyways, I've learnt how important it is to be yourself, because that's what makes you happy

My advice is that you take it easy for now. I'm not making any decisions for you. Your body is yours, and you could always try out more feminine clothing (I think looking for neutral looking stuff is good, so your parents won't question your choice of clothes ). Also, you could take some herbs, just not too much. You're still young, so it's better if you let your hormones settle down themselves first before trying to improve from there

Take your time to explore how you feel about...well, EVERYTHING. Give yourself some more years. Enjoy life and cherish what you love. You will know when is the time to make up your final decision and be completely confident about it. When that happens, nothing will stop you from making your own choice.

Good luck honey. You can make a thread and share your thoughts with us all, it might help. There are lots of lovely people here that can support you and lend their ears (eyes? haha).

Remember, don't let people try to influence you and insist THEIR thoughts into YOUR thoughts. Let your heart show you what's right.