01-05-2014, 12:05 AM
(30-04-2014, 10:29 PM)Lotus Wrote: Nice to see our Clara back, 30 days....whew!, did it feel like self imposed exile?,welcome back big sis!!
Thanks, Lotus. Yes, it was self-imposed. Among other things, I wanted to see what would happen if I deprived myself of PM for a full month. One important conclusion is that my female gender identity is not caused by taking PM. My GI never faltered for a minute under rising T and falling E levels. I'm sure that if I had decided to stay off PM, I would have ultimately reverted to my old crossdreaming ways with cross dressing being a sexual turn-on rather than an expression of my feminine personality. Higher T interfered with my being in control of my sexuality. It brought out the sexual demon in me, if you get my meaning. It's almost like being possessed by some kind of external force. On PM I feel that my sexuality is an integral part of me, and I find it's a much better way to live. Now that I'm back on PM, the demon is gone.
Clara (feeling in a good state of mind
)