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Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff...
September 7 2007 at 9:54 PM Davilee (Login Davi-lee)

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Well, reading many of the posts on the DIY Hormone site has left me with a particularly new distaste for screwing up my health.
All ya see is loads of people constantly worrying about their hormone levels and liver functions and problems with their prostates,scurrying from one doc to another to the endocrinologist to the this and that...BLAH!How do they afford all that??
It truly makes me hesitate going any further into this.
I really like my good health and really want to have it when I get older also.
Im thinking of all of the things I know about body biological systems and how they are going to get screwed up by switching around your hormone system.
There is all kinds of bone problems.
There are many blood problems also.Many of the people have blood clotting problems,and vein thrombosis.
Potassium levels too high and causing muscle cramps in the legs and blood problems
Chronic dehydration problems,,,,that in itself is responsible for many dangerous health problems not even related to this other stuff.
wow...sounds like fun.

I dont know if I can risk screwing up my health now.
Im going to have to continue trying to find good guidelines for hormone therapy,until I decide if its worth it to destroy my health in the long run.
It just seems that many of the people doing it are just going about it haphazardly,the doc's they are going to just give them whatever drug and dont seem to care what sideeffects there are.Many of them sound like they are way overmedicated,and taking several anti androgens at once.

ehhh...i still have the desire and *need* to do it.but im just going to have to consider it more carefully.Perhaps I can figure out a way to go very gradually into it using gentler estrogen meds and change very slowly instead of trying to go very fast as my desires want me to do.Thats the best I can do I guess.


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wishfulthinking
(Login wishfullthinking) go slow September 7 2007, 11:32 PM


I find myself many times at the same point you are having the same struggle and I keep telling myself go slow. The risks are not worth it. I've got a number of "girl" friends who are at differnt points on the journey but the one I look to is 60+ living full time as a woman and loving it. She has done absolutly nothing to change her birth biology but she is a woman. Aint Life grand. I work for a time in the chemical dependency field dealing daily with people who had filled there bodies daily with new chemicals never designed for their body. Boy were they F***ed Up. the ones on setiodes were some of the worst the damage to the body systems was many times irriversable. I learned we are a chemical factory and it does matter what chemical you put in Coke or E it screws up the factory. Put to much in to fast and the factory shuts down never to work right again and then you've got problems. So go slow take the least invasive route and always be carefull of that drive "to go very fast as my desires want me to do" We all have that to we want cute perky BIG things NOW. That only leads to disaster. Be healty when you get there so you can enjoy your dream, so you can live it. Don't arrive with a broken body and no time to enjoy the accomplishment go slow


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Anon
(no login) Davilee September 8 2007, 4:30 AM


Sounds like you are having a rough time with this decision. I don't want to see you do anything that would cause you harm in the future. Would it be better if you went the herb route rather than using meds? So what if it takes longer using herbs. Maturing women don't sprout from immature breasts to C-D cups within a year. I am going the SP, Fenugreek and Red Clover route as posted before, but I hope its a safe method. No one wants to be ill. I just hope my program is safe too.

I hope you find a safe and effective program to follow.


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Fennel Fairy
(no login) You are absolutely right September 8 2007, 6:43 AM


Too much all at once can't be good for anyone. It's the mindless misuse of a multitude of drugs that's dangerous. A lot of people haven't got the intelligence to research about what they are taking and if the different drugs go well together or cause side effects. Some don't seem to care and take just about ANYTHING. Some idiots deliberately overdose because they think they will get faster results but that's where they are wrong.

I still think herbs taken in lower doses over a longer period of time with breaks here and there is a much safer way to do it than the REAL hormones. Sure it's nice to be able to live like a woman at last, if that's how one feels inside, but what's the point if you only get to live your "new" life for a year or two? You have got some very valid viewpoints there.

Still, you have enough brains and knowledge to find a good balance in all this I think. Health comes first.


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Davilee
(Login Davi-lee) Thanks everybody.... September 8 2007, 8:48 AM


Hiya, ya Im just in a stew about my body.
Im not saying that Phy.Est's havent done anything....no,no..just the opposite.They have been great and really saved my mental firmity.
Im moving along fine,its just so slow,and I want to create some real definite unalterable changes before I get much older.

I believe in the botanicals efficacy,thats why I devote so much time to studying them all the time.They are great for so many health concerns.

When I saw myself changing so well,I just want to change quicker...ya know?
Im changing fairly well,..slow but sure..as we were saying..eh?

Ahhh..its just I see others that *seem* to be racing ahead,in changes and I get envious...and then I think wrecklessly. Its dumb,I know....I should be wiser than that by now.

But I havent fell for it blindly quite yet.

Im almost there as to figureing out a low dose med program of hard estrogens.
My problem is the antiandrogens..they sound worse than the med.estrogens as to sideeffects and problems.

I think that Im going to go back and reconsider the B.Ovary glandulars,that Morticia is using,they may be just what Im needing as to enough estrogenic affect.If she can have such good results on it,then I should really do fairly well,as I seem to have a quick reaction to any of these estrogenics.
I will try them I think before jumping into the drug game.

Thanks for your concern and taking time to reply.
I just needed to vent off a bit,and this is a good place to do it,without hurting anybody...at least Im really trying now to not be a little sister brat to anyone anymore.hahaha

I like you folks 'cause,I know you WILL comment and tell me what you think.
Thats the problem with that yahoo group,its kinda impersonal and no one really seems to care when you ask something related to personal feelings or problems or what-have-you. I guess its because we're a smaller group,and get to know each other better here. I just like that.Thats what I need,someone to really discuss things with sometimes.
~~Davilee


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 8 2007, 9:20 AM


Some people have the choice to continue or quit.
And some of us do not have a choice, it's either do it or die.
For me, I must complete the journey or commit suicide.
Those are MY options.


_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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Davilee
(Login Davi-lee) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 9 2007, 3:41 AM


Yah,I know how you feel Morticia.

But Im here for bigger things at somepoint in the future,Im not quitting this life just yet.Im supposed to be around for something,its my feeling.

Im just a stubborn spirit,and I'm not going to go under because of these problems. Unless,I get worse mentally,trying to deal with my body.
Sometimes,the depressions do grind me down.


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TB
(no login) Re: Funk September 10 2007, 2:51 PM


@Davilee, I think you should stop. You always have a choice. Anyone who would say "Commit to my journey or commit suicide", that's ridiculous, they need a shrink. There are few things in this life that would justify suicide, I cannot think of any. My cousin killed himself. Despair is what drives people to kill themselves. Don't despair. Stop what your doing, stand back and take a good look at yourself. Maybe the change you need will come from the inside, not the outside. Get in touch with the spiritual side of yourself and get some answers. This has turned into a Transgender/Transexual thread. That is why I have not posted here much anymore. It started out as guys who wanted breasts but turned into something else. As a guy who just wanted breasts I am not interested in all of the other transgender issues. I just wanted tits, got them, and have moved on. I will probably get a lot of people pissed at me for this but it is just what I feel. This is not the same forum that started when I first found it. There may be some guys out there who just want breasts and now think they have to go the whole TG/TS route. I have very high testosterone levels and still grew breasts. Maybe there should be a TG/TS thread on feminization. I feel alienated from this forum now. IMHO.


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 10 2007, 4:56 PM


Yes! This isn't something I would want to kill myself over.Things may be hard at times but so is everything else in life too.
I also want things to happen a little faster too, because the mones don't have a good effect once you reach fifty and over. I still have a few years to go. That's the only reason I want to speed things up a bit. If I was in my 20s or 30s,I'd be in it for the long haul.
I have 3 years to go to 50 and if it doesn't do anything by then, Then so be it. Sure! I wouldn't be too happy but I'd carry on as is. I've been a male most of my life and I suppose I could live the rest of it as one.
There is no point in trying to kill myself about it anymore. If it happens,WOW,SUPER,GREAT, if it doesn't that's fine too. The only regret I have is that I should of started alot earlier and not spend so much time fighting it.


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 10 2007, 5:15 PM


Yes, TB Your right about this being a forum about males growing Breasts.I understand how you feel. This is one of the reasons I joined a TG forum and that's where I belong. Although growing breasts is a part of feminization,I can see that it alienates alot of you and you shouldn't have to feel that way. I'm sure there is alot of info. we can all contribute, TG or non TGs. There isn't "anybody" here that's an expert about this. Believe me, I Know. Since this is one of the only forums of its kind, We can all benefit being members here. So, I would say that all the non TG members should stay and let their oppinions be heard. I will hang around too, because I'm still on the Natural methodes and trying to grow breasts.


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Fennel
(no login) TB... September 10 2007, 5:23 PM


There are a few other guys on here that are ordinary married men who are trying to grow breasts, I think about 3 other than yourself. None of them post very often though which is a pity. I remember you being here when I arrived as a refugee from the girl forum. I have no business being here at all really other than just liking it here :-)

Anyway, I miss your posts. I hope that the other dudes will post a bit more here too because as BluJay said, we can all learn tips and tricks from eachother regardless of gender or sexuality.


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 10 2007, 8:26 PM


I say the same thing as Fennel, we all can benefit from one another's experiences.

I'm trannssexual but I still enjoy reading the stuff you non TS folks have to post.
Our goals are somewhat similar, a little parallel but with different destinations.

I want to hear what everyone has to say because I take in and consume ALL the information.
Like taking in the harvest, I separate the wheat from the chaff, I use what I think I think I can and discard the other. And I try to contribute to the harvest from time to time by sharing the experiences of my journey.

It's really quite simple to ignore posts that don't apply to you, just *read on*...

There is no black and white science to this. It's all trial and error. By as many people as possible sharing their experiences we can greatly reduce the error factor and increase our success rate a little more.

To everyone, please continue to share. So what if you don't want to have a sex change. So what if you do.
You want to grow tits, tells us what you know, what you find, what works, what doesn't.
Tell us the side effects, all of them. It's for our general benefit.

Thanks.



_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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Anon
(no login) TB September 11 2007, 12:37 AM


I agree with the others, some people do want the full, all out conversion, but others like me, just want to stay heterosexual but have some breasts. I am still plodding away with SP, Red Clover and Fenugreek... hopefully at low dosages. No results yet.

But as a heterosexual, I am certainly interested in you opinions as you are married, have relatives and friends, and have breasts that are there for all to see. I am interested in how you deal with breast issues "out and about", whats it like to wear bras regularly, what you like/dislike about bra's, how you check-ups are going with your doctor, and any good or bads you have found health-wise about deciding to grow larger. I know you said your sister who is large breasted was aware of your growth and has remained a solid friend for you. Any conflicting evidence on herbs, gynecomastia, BC, mamograms, .... even what it feels to move around with breasts. I am very curious about all this.

Of course we would be interested. You mave have "grown", but we need your insight considering we want to stay in our same bodies. I hope you stick around.




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wishfulthinking
(Login wishfullthinking) Stick around September 11 2007, 1:00 AM


TB, don't feel alienated there are lots here reading and learning, ghosts if you will, that would be perfectly happy to just get breasts and nothing else, the fourm to function for any male who come here needs both sides. It needs to provide clear guidance to all that come on all that might happen so they can have the info to make a clear decision. We need you guy you made it and I'd love to know how you did it. Each of us here wants breast some want more than that, some for what ever reson a driven harder than other to get there. Don't let that put you off. Stay share and keep some of the young guys from running off spending all their money and doing something stupid.


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Dreamer
(Login Boob-Dreamer)
SENIOR MEMBER Back to basics September 11 2007, 3:37 AM


TB,
Fennel and others have summed up the situation very well. Like you I am hetrosexual, married and with a passion for having breasts of my own. If I am honest I would like to wear a bra all the time but I recognise the problems and am happy to compromise, currently going without a bra is more discrete, from a work and family point of view.
This forum has provided a wealth of information and inspiration, Fennel you deserve a medal for your contributions. I am sure that there are many people like me, happy to sit on the side lines learning and contributing every now and then. You are right, however, that the emphasis has changed over the last few months but it is still a very healthy unbiased, non judgemental web site. Every day I am reminded of this when I feel my arms rubbing on my new found breast growth. Perhaps I would not have got here without the support, knowledge and inspiration provided by you (TB) and others.
I am sure that we would all appreciate it if you stayed with us.

Regards


Dreamer.

PS.
Fennel, I was in Stockholm last week and will be there again next week. In the old town there was a shop with SLUT on the window. Is this a new export venture that you are setting up?




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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 4:38 AM


One other thing I want to throw in, we're ALL transgender here with the exception of the GG's.

If you were born in a male body then take steps to modify your body, IE grow breasts and or additional female sexual characteristics, you're crossing the gender boundaries and YOU are a transgendered person.

We all have something in common, like it or not. Some of us just take it further than others.
But we're all transgendered here.



_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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Fennel Fairy
(no login) Dreamer September 11 2007, 6:46 AM


quote:
Fennel, I was in Stockholm last week and will be there again next week. In the old town there was a shop with SLUT on the window. Is this a new export venture that you are setting up?/end of quote.

Slut means "end" in Swedish. You probably saw a sign that read "Slut Rea" which means "end of sales". :-)

Any chance of a meetup while you are in Stockholm next? I live very close. We could go for a pint.


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 3:02 PM


I read read on one of the above posts that someone had mentioned that they are heterosexual. Just to clarify, Most transgendered are heterosexual! Their desire for becomming opposite sex has nothing to do with their sexual orientation or preference.
It is possible that the sexual preferance might change for a few, after a longer period of being on hormones or after srs. Most end up keeping their sexual preference that they always had.


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 7:48 PM


I do not believe that simply taking female hormones will flip your sexual orientation.

It may bring to the surface hidden or repressed things that have always been there to begin with but I do not believe it will cause one to suddenly or even eventually flip over to the other side or start looking at men or want to run out and suck c**k...

Taking the hormones DOES cause your mind to see the world in a different light though.

I wouldn't worry about it too much.

_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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TB
(no login) slight difference September 11 2007, 9:15 PM


Wanting to get in touch with your feminine side and wanting to become a female a different goals. I can understand the overlap though.


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 9:27 PM


I agree that the hormones won't change your sexual orientation but that it can bring up some things that are hidden deep within the mind.So,what that means is, that if someone has a hidden desire to be with a member of the same sex, the high amount of hormones could bring that to surface. That only happens to a very few.The same thing with SRS,but they are worth mentioning.
My main concern was that people use the word "heterosexual" in a way, that it sounds like it doesn't apply to the Transgendered people. When completely the opposite is true.
Just to confirm an earlier post by Morticia,Yes if you cross the gender boundries,even if you just want to grow a pair of breasts, you are considered to be transgendered. ;-)


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 9:33 PM


And being TG is not a bad thing. Just think about it, you have one foot each in two different universes simultaneously.
You get the rare opportunity to view the world in an entirely different way. Let the feminine thoughts run their course, it won't kill you and it may make you a better person in the end.

I know that I've let go of my anger, aggression, hatred, etc.. I've mellowed out a lot this year.
It's a humbling experience.

_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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TB
(no login) ? September 11 2007, 11:34 PM


I don't think developing gynecomastia makes you TG. Desiring female breasts does not make you TG. I think there is more to calling yourself transexual or transgendered. I do not relate to the comments from the transexual/transgendered community posts. I think that is the point I am trying to make. I do not want to be a women. I just wanted breasts. They were growing in anyway I just helped them along (anyone who has read my earlier posts knows what I am talking about). I think I fall into a different category. If I wanted to be a women I would have no trouble stating it. It is not something I desire. My physical problem caused this tohappen to me and I went with the flow. Many older men developed gynecomastia but they are not TG. If you don't mind the gynecomastia, I don't think that makes you TG either. I think a transgendered person ( a real one) is going thru a lot more than what I am. Their desire is far deeper and is not something to be taken so lightly i.e. I want a set of boobs. I think there is more to it than that.


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 11 2007, 11:59 PM


being transgendered does necessarily mean that you want to be a woman.
It just means that you have crossed the gender boundaries. That's all.
If you have moobs via pure nature, that's one thing.
If you intentionally and actively modify your body to develop female type breasts which are they secondary sexual characteristic of females, then you are crossing the gender boundaries.
Check out Kate Bornstein sometime, she has

No one here is trying to turn you into a trannie or call you a trannie or a shemale or anything like that.

In all seriousness, don't take it so seriously. You know what you want and what makes you happy. Go for it. Enjoy it. And please, by all means, share your experience with us if you will.

Like someone else said earlier, we try not to be judgemental here. We're here to share and learn.
We're all very happy that YOU are here sharing with us so that we can learn from what you have to contribute.

_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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TB
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 12 2007, 1:45 AM


I am not worrying about what anybody calls me. I was just thinking (or sticking) to the first posts about Davilee wishing to quit doing the herbs and the possibility of doing harm which might come up in the future. I was trying to draw the distinction between a transexual who "really needs" to make a change as opposed to someone who feels like just screwing around to see what might happen. As you are a transexual and from what I have read from your posts you have and are researching deeper than someone who might just want a set a boobs. My point is that whatever you do really put thought behind it (you in general), so that you may not do something that "you" may regret. Te damage to my pituitary gland caused me to have a hormone imbalance that started the gynecomastia. You have made (I believe) a conscious effort in your decisions involving transexuality. It is the people who just try things out for the hell of it without much though that made me wonder. I decided if I was going to have moobs I wanted them to look "nice". I have met so many guys who are freaked out about their "moobs" and ones who have made nasty remarks. I have increased and manipulated the looks of my breasts to the aforementioned end. If you haven't tried progesterone cream I highly recommend it. Sexually I have done everything there is to do so in all that I discovered I wanted a woman and have a wonderful wife of 20 years. I just hope people think things through. Two of my favorite looking trannies was Dany Evagelista, before the boob job and Patricia Araujo, both pre-op but hot.


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Dreamer
(Login Boob-Dreamer)
SENIOR MEMBER Stockholm September 12 2007, 3:47 AM


Thanks Fennell, a pint would be a great idea. I will be travelling to Stockholm with colleagues next week (subject to accommodation as all the hotels are booked up) and unfortunately I will not have the opportunity. If/when I am travelling on my own I will give you a shout and we can arrange to meet somewhere. Hopefully my business commitments will allow this in the foreseeable future.

I am just starting the herbs again after a two week break to allow the body to restore to normal. I am going to try to find the minimum doseage that will keep a warm glow in my boobs.

Dreamer


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 12 2007, 4:06 PM


I think that Morticia and I should clarify that the word Transgendered is an Umbrella word that covers a variety of GID. Being Transexual,crossdressers,androgyne are just a few of them. And, No, this doesn't mean anyone is Homosexual.
People that are growing breasts or have gynomastia because of a medical condition do not fit in this catagory,But anybody that deliberatly manipulates their bodys to grow breasts or enhance the appearance of their breasts, do fit in this catagory. There are many people that have some form of GID that don't even realize that they have it. What we are saying it's not a bad thing if someone is transgendered.
The reason alot of people get hostile about this type of condition,is that they don't understand it and they don't take the time to learn the facts about it. It might be the fear of finding out that they, themselves, might somehow fit into this catagory. I don't know!
I,myself, for many years didn't know that I was TG, I just knew that there was something different about me.
Maybe Morticia has something to add to understanding the meaning of TG or GID.
This is one of the main problems that the Transgendered community is facing, that people just don't know enough about it.


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 12 2007, 8:21 PM


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender

To be taken with a grain of salt.

_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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mbe
(Login mbe1) labels and sticking around September 13 2007, 7:20 AM


I think there is a difference between someone who wants some female characteristics, ie, breasts and a nicer personality, but still maintains the psychological role of a man as compared to someone who wants a complete sex change and psychologically is a woman.

I am in the former category and have come up with the label: Feman to so define myself. Here is a little limerick I wrote about the subject.

There's many a man with no breasts,
Who've a burning desire to test,
Phytoestrogens effects
On developing their pecs
And becoming Femen with nice breasts!

Labels have there place and uses, but I just think that all of us are on a grand experiment, that is widening the potential of future generations to be their real selves.

To Davilee and anyone else who is in a funk. I agree that you should be careful with chemicals, we all should be. I get into my funks, about my breasts, too. Then I remember that there are other things in life and I have no idea what is going to happen next, and that brightens up my day.

______________
www.male-breast-enlargement.org | http://malebreastenlargement.blogspot.com/


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Fennel Fairy
(no login) Sorry, I always have to do the worst limerick: September 13 2007, 7:47 AM


There is this dude who wants some tits
But don't want to alter his "bits"
The cohosh was blue
He ran to the loo
The herbs would just give him the S H I T S


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TB
(no login) How about a limerick thread? September 14 2007, 4:07 PM


I was under this guy named Bob.
He was doing a really great job.
I was feeling kind of wussy
When he pulled it out of me
and said:
That not an ******* thats a pussy!!

True story.


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Fennel
(no login) Hey... September 14 2007, 6:02 PM


We should start a limerick thread!

A chatboard about growing breasts
made a middle aged man so obsessed
that he overdosed badly
on herbs, and then sadly
exploded his oversized chest


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Davilee
(Login Davi-lee) What the Heck!?!?! They're trying to commit me while Ive been gone!! September 16 2007, 11:16 AM


Alright who the hell tagged me with saying I wanted to commit suicide!!!!
TB I presume?? I never said I was going to commit suicide,if you had more carefully read the commentary between me and Morticia,you would have noticed that she is talking that way,, NOT ME!!
I had just stated after she said that...that I am not going to do myself in for this reason....read carefully **what is written in the post and **whos post they are.
Geez....Im sometimes depressed but I have a lot to live for.
If you had read what I wrote carefully,you would see that I never once said I was definitely,assuredly,finally going to attempt to kill me off.
I said I was contemplating stopping the transition work.

WELL,,Im having way to much fun seeing how my body is changing lately to do anything like that.Im up to 140 pounds!!! and have quite a nice butt and legs!!!!hehehehee Im mainly concentrating on weight gain so When/If I do go on stronger stuff I can have the fat reserves necessary for changes.

I was just in a funk because I hate my body hair and facial hair and I kept seeing about everybody elses good body changes every time I turned around for awhile on various sites.It just discouraged me. I wanted quicker results.**impatiently tapping foot**

Another great thing is,,,I am getting a lot of new hair growth,growing in amongst my other hair making it thicker,(I already had thick hair,its going to be crazy after awhile) I have never had any hair losses,just had the bad inhereted trait of a higher hairline,,.....BUT thats changing also!!! Im growing hair in places forward of my standard hair line,so my hairline is effectively moving forward.
I think thats way cool.

Im going to grow my hair out way long and get a wave treatment or a light perm.That will look so amazing.
My hair is just super straight and flat....blaaaaaaahhhhhhh.....

Then a good makeup job,a lovely light turtleneck sweater, a cool tight skirt,colored dress hose,low heel simple shoes, and accessories and KA-POW!! I then get to go pick up my official TG T-shirt and hat.HAHAHAHA
except Im not wearing the hat 'cause it will mess up my hairdo.heeeheee

I hadnt read all the gobbledygook thats been written since I was here last so,I'll have something else to say after I go back and read it.

Cheers ALL!



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Davilee
(Login Davi-lee) I regret even saying how i feel now....as it keeps getting blown out of proportion September 17 2007, 9:37 AM


Quote from TB:
@Davilee, I think you should stop. You always have a choice. Anyone who would say "Commit to my journey or commit suicide", that's ridiculous, they need a shrink.
>>>I didnt say this,and Im fully aware of my situation and mental stability thank you<<<

There are few things in this life that would justify suicide, I cannot think of any. My cousin killed himself. Despair is what drives people to kill themselves. Don't despair. Stop what your doing, stand back and take a good look at yourself. Maybe the change you need will come from the inside, not the outside. Get in touch with the spiritual side of yourself and get some answers. This has turned into a Transgender/Transexual thread.

>>>there are all sorts of topics going on<<<
>>>I dont see the entire male forum turning into a TG/TS party<<<

That is why I have not posted here much anymore. It started out as guys who wanted breasts but turned into something else. As a guy who just wanted breasts I am not interested in all of the other transgender issues. I just wanted tits, got them, and have moved on. I will probably get a lot of people pissed at me for this but it is just what I feel. This is not the same forum that started when I first found it. There may be some guys out there who just want breasts and now think they have to go the whole TG/TS route. I have very high testosterone levels and still grew breasts. Maybe there should be a TG/TS thread on feminization. I feel alienated from this forum now. IMHO.
_
Quote of TB sent to someone else:
to draw the distinction between a transexual who "really needs" to make a change as opposed to someone who feels like just screwing around to see what might happen. As you are a transexual and from what I have read from your posts you have and are researching deeper than someone who might just want a set a boobs. My point is that whatever you do really put thought behind it (you in general), so that you may not do something that "you" may regret.



-------------------------------------------
Hiya,
I just had to bring this up again.
Am I so indecipherable?Are my intentions that obscure?
I would think by now anyone that has read any of my posts could figure out that Im serious about trying to bring my body more in line with my gender.
I actually go *too far sometimes explaining myself many times.
I want to be a woman.
Its simple in concept of desire but difficult in actual implementation.
However,I also have the desire to be pregnant and bear children,....that is not going to ever happen even if I had the greatest SRS available within modern medical tech.
Thats the main reason that going all the way to a SRS is stupid for me,I can never fulfill in reality, what I want and need,so there's no reason to waste huge loads of money and loads of pain and possible surgical screwups.
I would just be a mock woman,in the sense of no real ability to procreate.
It would just be a farce,even if I had a redesigned genitalia,*I,the girl* wouldnt be completely happy,it would just be a dissapointment.
Reality and science limitations decree that I just cannot go far enough with current surgery technology to fufill my complete desires;so,there is no need for me to put myself through years of surgeries as some TSwomen I have spoken to have done.
I will feminise my already feminine male body as much as I can with hormone applications and some selective smaller surgeries,at some point.
Thats why I spend ridiculous amounts of time among different venues of info.,so I can think of new possibilities for breast growth,......so that part of me can match up with the rest of my body which does look feminine.
I just obsess that my chest looked so wrong without breasts there.
It would balance out my body and make me feel better about myself.

Seek the spirtual side of myself?Nice intention from you. There again you dont know me at all,Ive spent my entire life seeking answers to spiritual questions.Going from one religion to another to the occult to pantheism to philosophy to blahblah...Im a very spirtual person Im not a religious person,thats what I found out definitely about myself,the answers to Who I was and Why I was, were not going to be found going through rituals and prescribed beliefs from authoritarian constructs.
When I matured enough I realised Buddhism fit exactly with what I thought about life and the cosmos.The original Theravadin Dhammism taught by Goutama Buddha.Its more a spirtual philosophy,not a religion.Buddha didnt like empty religion and began his school as an alternative to the authoritarian,dogmatic Hinduism.

As far as making a definitive statement as to TG/TS people are this certain way or that......I think that there is just as wide of variance as found in the rest of the population.Many TG/TS MtF are attracted to gene guys.Many are attracted to gene girls.Many are attracted to other TG/TS MtF.
It seems that most TG/TS FtM are attracted to gene women,although many are attracted to gene men or other FtM TS's.
It does get confusing.
Im not sure where i fit exactly.I thought I was BI. and then I realised a long while ago that I was attracted to girls mostly because I wanted to BE a girl.hahaha.Im still attracted to women also,just not strongly,its more of an deep admiration.
Well,my repressed attraction to guys has only increased and gotten more certain as Ive progressed in hormone effects.Even though the phytoestrogenic compounds are weaker than bioestrogen,they have had an effect on my brain.
They seemed to have cemented in my truest gender wiring in my brain.
Although,I am attracted to TG/TS MtF non-op'ed also,I think that its because I am attracted to a person who wants to be in between genders,......androgynous.Thats how I feel mainly ,since I cant be what I really want,I just have to make the best of this life and bod.

Okay,...Ive never judged anyone on here for who they were or what they were trying to achieve.Its not my business.Just as I wouldnt expect anyone,but some of the women,to question me.I try and blend in on both sides,and hope I dont offend anyone.I like to discuss things with the women on the other side,it seems natural to me...,but Im sure if some of them realised who/what I was,they might get upset.
As I was saying,I just try and help everyone with getting information and try to be a friendly person.I said Trying.haha
Sometimes I get overzealous and upset over something said,or misinterpereted about me.I like to be understood above all.
I thought we WERE all getting along and discussing things just fine.
Am I delusional?? The heterosexual people outnumber the TG/TS people,I do believe.

I find it sort of offensive that some people are claiming territory,like TG/TS folk arent welcome here. Are we too graphic and forward?
I write a lot of posts about herbs and other breast related stuff.
Most every topic posted by everybody are Non-TG/TS related.
I've just come on here as a person seeking advise and info.from others,I have no agenda,Im not trying to change anyone or convert anyone to any orientation.
I AM ME,im sorry(not) if just posting on here is offensive to someone.
I talk about TG/TS issues because thats what Im about and what some of the others are about also.You dont have to read the TG/TS related posts.
Our TG/TS clan has to learn from each other,because no one else understands us,....AND I hope its a consolation,but WE can understand the hetero guys too.
We know what it means to desire certain changes to the body.
I feel like I can relate to both sexes motivations and desires,to some extent.
I dont judge people considering these issues,because I feel that Ive been so screwedup,...what do I know about someone else's journey?

Im not going to jump to conclusions,I could muse on certain theorys about why some people desire a thing OR what is the real motivation in a males psyche that causes them to want breasts.However,I dont want to offend anyone,and I would just be stepping into speculation as to repressed sexual orientation and such&such.
Perhaps for another discussion if someone wants to strike it up.
~~Sincerely,Davilee


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Anon
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 19 2007, 4:09 AM


I think we all should be acceptive of one another. I really enjoy hearing both sides of the breast debate... those that want only breasts, and those that want the transformation. There is nothing bad from either camp. We can help each other. I am not going to put anyone down at all. I really enjoy the company from this board from all participants. Let's stay happy everyone!


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Fennel Fairy
(Login fennelfairy)
SENIOR MEMBER We are all the same. September 19 2007, 7:12 AM


We are all a group of human beings (of various genders) who are growing/enhancing breasts. We all have different reasons for doing this, and different methods. Our common interest is to find a way to do this effectively and safely, and for some of us; how to deal with the reactions of friends and relatives. Let's help eachother out! *insert hippie group hug here*


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 19 2007, 8:05 AM


I'm in a funk too.
bad thoughts are leaking in.


_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 19 2007, 6:48 PM


Yep! I feel like i'm in kind of a funk too. I feel kind of depressed and I don't really know why.I think it might be the hormones taking their toll,at times it's really exhausting.
I believe that these feelings are just a temporary thing. I hope!


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TB
(no login) Huh? September 20 2007, 12:59 PM


"they should see a shrink" was referring to the person who said "they" would have to commit suicide before stopping, not you.. Do whatever you want. If you write confusing posts you'll get confusing answers. Bye.


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Morticia
(Login moonstruck61) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 20 2007, 7:07 PM


I have nothing further to contribute here.

_______________________________________

http://transhouston.com/members/blog/morticia
My private little stash of girly goodies: http://tgchix.dyndns.org/girlystuff.html
_______________________________________



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Blu-Jay
(no login) What The? September 20 2007, 8:07 PM


I don't know what's happening here!


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Fennel Fairy
(no login) Erm... September 20 2007, 8:52 PM


I'm not sure but it seems like everyone is either offing themselves, getting funky or leaving.


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gail_tg
(no login) Well..I am still here - hypnosis rules ! September 20 2007, 10:31 PM


Well, I am still here. Hypnosis is safe and works Smile


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Anon
(no login) I'll stick around September 21 2007, 1:48 PM


I hate to see people depart; I enjoy hearing about everyones success. Even though I have no success to report, I feel this is a good forum.

I wonder if Morticia's plan was too aggressive and caused to major mood swings? He did grow well. Maybe things will settle with him. I can understand his turmoil, and wish him a happy life. His earlier posts were so full of life and excitement.


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Fennel
(no login) Just want to point out that... September 21 2007, 7:02 PM


Morticia, although living in a male shell, is a she.

And yes, this is a good forum. I just find it sad that people can't get along at times, or feel like they don't belong here. Hell - I belong here less than anybody else but I kind of hang around anyway. :-)


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Blu-Jay
(no login) Re: Im in a funk and have almost decided to say screw all of this hormone stuff... September 21 2007, 7:41 PM


Yes, I think Morticias plan is aggressive and could be causing depression,I feel that she's trying to accomplish to much, in too short of time,But I believe it's much more deeper than that.
If she feels like talking about it, she will.
For now she needs some space to think things over.


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Davilee
(Login Davi-lee) Hiya all.....Ive been busy........ September 26 2007, 10:18 AM


Well, being a female in your mind and heart and having to live with a body thats not the sex you want to be grinds on a person over years of life.
Whats not to understand,if a person is just gotten damned tired of living like a genetic mistake.It doesnt get any better as you go along,some folks just get too weary of the constant disjointedness of their lives.
I feel like a freak sometimes because,I dont have the body that I exactly want.There is so many traits that are too male that disgust me.
That guy TB has no idea what he's even talking about when he's trying to comment on TG/TS folks lives.Im sorry to say but a therapist is not going to fix gender disphoria,its something your born with,the brain has been changed by some factor and its a fact and permanent, there's no therapy-discussion thats going to make it go away..and then they just want to give a person "happy pills" to mask the true thoughts.Its a joke.
I have read of many people screwedup worse on the mood altering drugs.

I still dont understand what I wrote thats confusing for that one guy.
He's the one writing confusing posts ,just remarking in generalities and I have no idea who hes talking about or to.
Damn it,Im mad at myself for getting caught up in that B.S.,but I have this need to clarify things when someone starts talking about me, and not to me.
Sorry for not defending you earlier Morticia,instead of just reacting hastily.