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Seismic Shift ?

#21

(29-06-2016, 04:27 PM)Sofia Lauren Bunny Wrote:  Oh the tangled webs we weave! So lets see first started with the intent of just growing breast. Was almost 99.7% sure I had no intention of transitioning. At the time was wearing colorful bikini briefs (male), had a few body suits, a few bralettes, a few stockings, stuff I would just wear on occasion because I enjoyed the way they felt. In the beginning I was pretty adamant about not transitioning, but was not completely closed off to the idea as I have found in time things can change.

I had a few issues with my emotions flaring up as I was getting used to the hormonal changes in my body. That mostly settled, finally. Except for when I go on break, towards the end of the week I am a mess. Then little things started to change. I started buying women's underwear, bras, camisoles, slips etc. Still, I was pretty sure I had no intentions of transitioning, just really enjoyed the softness and comfort of those items.
...
So the question I keep asking myself, was this something that was buried deep inside of me and is barely coming to the surface? More and more I find suppressed memories coming out that shed some light here and there. Or is it my regiment that is driving me towards this new destination. Perhaps it is my regiment that is unlocking the doors that were locked long ago. I really don't know. I do know that my mind has shifted from where it was when I first started.

This sounded so familiar to me, I even posted something to that effct on the BO point of no Return thread

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I have been on my quest for breasts for about 10 years, during which I have used a variety of things. My original desire was to acquire female breasts. Over time this desire has morphed into a need to feminize my body as completely as possible and to ultimately live the balance of my life as a woman. This has become a deep seeded desire, a need, maybe an obsession. So, maybe I have gone past the point of no return, if you look at that point as a flipping of a mental switch as opposed to a transformation of your endocrine system to function as a female. Can I stop taking NBE? Probably not. It has become who I am, besides I like the feelings it has introduced into my being.

As to what am I taking, right now I am on PM, with WP and a WY mixture. I took BO for 5 months with minimal physical success. I have been on Pharma with the most physical changes, and some of the commercial NBE products with minimal effects.
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It seems our brains are destine to be rewired if we play with our hormones. It is not a matter of if, bt a matter of when. Take them long enough and the mental changes will come along with the physical.

My issues was denying and trying to suppress my feminine needs in an effort to conform to the American societal norms of of male/female. I have gained a certain amount of personal peace Since accepting that I am the other gender. I am still scared to completely come out, but that courage slowly builds in proportion to my wife's tolerance of Christina and my overt expressions of femininity. For the most part, I do not care what the rest of the world thinks of me. I am accepted as a woman in many of the stores i frequent, even when dressed in male attire. No one has ever been mean or nasty to me, so maybe my fears are unjustified or steeped in baggage of the past. Not to say that day will not come. I am sure there will be overt discrimination if and when i transition to full time. But by then i will have hopefully gained the courage to let that negative energy roll off my back like water on a duck.

I am rambling.

Back to the point, You do not get something for nothing. You do not get female breasts without a seismic shift in your brains wiring.

Christina
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#22

(30-06-2016, 01:10 PM)julieTG Wrote:  Hi Flame

its never quite got the yes I want to be a woman, as I dont, but more the fact that I allowed myself to consider it ?

Looking at some of the 2012 girls including super gorgeous demon,

see how many say

I had/have no tg tendencies , I just want small breasts, then

boom they have transitioned ?

Scary

Julie

Ha ha ha, that's why in the beginning I stayed away from PM and BO, I had read so many peoples starts and finishes and it appeared that those were the "gateway herbs" to transitioning. So that to me was scary. But I had also read several that said it had not affected them. So I took the gamble with PM hoping I would not be affected. As I mentioned, I don't believe I was affected, at least not in the beginning, just took some time for things to sink and settle in.

Now I can't say for certain whether my regiment is what is swaying my outlook on things or not. It could be a myriad of things, cannot say with 100% certainty what is the cause.

Perhaps with yourself a very small part of you toys with the idea what it would like to be a women, but not something you would want on a permanent basis?
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#23

Difficult stuff,

but some say on the hardened ts and tg boards (the ones that state your only a real tg/ts if on synthetics),

that many tg people go on real hrt for a short time, get the growth results and stop,

its quite common ?

ummmmm ?

Julie
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#24

(30-06-2016, 04:42 PM)julieTG Wrote:  Difficult stuff,

but some say on the hardened ts and tg boards (the ones that state your only a real tg/ts if on synthetics),

that many tg people go on real hrt for a short time, get the growth results and stop,

its quite common ?

ummmmm ?

Julie

I feel, if you have Transgender tendencys, your brain is already partly wired towards the feminine side. All the HRT meds are doing is pushing it further along.
I'll assume there will be some people with a fetish for breasts that are able to turn the need on and off.

I always wondered, if you take an obviously matcho alpha male, and force feed them HRT meds, would their brain still get re-wired.?

I guess it's also worth mentioning, that although my sig says transitioning, I still live and present as male. For the same reasons others have mentioned in their reply's, family & work. ( This something that's possibly in your future Julie ). Its just a path we are on, for some the full male to female transition is going to be a small one. For my self ( and possibly you ) that path may be a much longer journey. In 10 years time, I could be retired. Who knows what can happen then.
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#25

(30-06-2016, 01:10 PM)julieTG Wrote:  Hi Flame

its never quite got the yes I want to be a woman, as I dont, but more the fact that I allowed myself to consider it ?

Looking at some of the 2012 girls including super gorgeous demon,

see how many say

I had/have no tg tendencies , I just want small breasts, then

boom they have transitioned ?

Scary

Julie

Julie,

I've been taking pm since 2012 and I have no interest in transitioning. Maybe I'm an outlier?

Anyway, I tend to think that since transitioning is a significant change, it's not something people do without serious consideration. As you have no plans to transition I would say leave it at that. If you change your mind on this, I suggest talking to us here on the forum. I highly doubt nbe herbs have some sort of mind-controlling properties that makes people want to transition.
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#26

Flame I agree

Thats why rocks like

You, sfem, pansy are all so important

It can done

Breasts and no transition
well social anyway

Julie
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#27

Hi Julie,

I think that current body of evidence does not allow us to conclude that oestrogenic substances are ultimate mind-warping feminizing factor. I believe that in susceptible individuals there are many factors which can cause them to slowly slide the slippery slope. Herbs, oestrogens are such factors as well as for example being socially accepted as a woman, trying to feminize one's appearance by other means, feminine grooming etc. And those factors have additive effect. It means that each such factor slowly feeds feminine identity, makes it stronger while reduces masculine identity until the feminine overweights the masculine and transition is accepted as a possible option.

Oestrogenic compounds may be strong factor. But what is their mechanism of action? It is more biological? Or psychological? In other terms - does it really cause brain rewiring or it just psychology in work? Because causing permanent changes, periodically take a pill can serve as a constant reassurance that "I am feminizing myself..."

So the first question is whether or not you are susceptible individual.

And the second question is: if there are feminizing factors aren't there also factors with opposite effect? If this theory is correct, some of us might be able to keep some level of control...

I have to admit that ideas outlined in my post are not from my own head. There is one blog post dealing with issues as pink fog, slippery slope as well as with some strategies not to slide too fast. I find ideas outlined there really intriguing.

http://transblog.grieve-smith.com/the-slippery-slope/

(Not that I am currently utilising those strategies myself. And to tell the truth I even don't want... Tongue )

Poly
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#28

Exactly my beautiful poly

That's why I did not list you as one of my rocks ?

Your too slippery

Hugs

X

Julie
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#29

Good article

Sis

X
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#30

I believe there is some proclivity beforehand.. the hormonal addition only compounds what is already there.

as I had mentioned in other posts, there are resemblences in the hypothalamus of TG (MTF) and female being similar and the differences of TG (MTF) and males being vastly different. Studies had concluded that hormonal treatment in adulthood does little to change the structure of the already formed hypothalamus.
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