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oki's program

#41

Oki, I have nothing else to say than "WOW!"

It appears you've grown not only physically, but there have been changes in your mind as well.

Your breasts are really beautiful. Their shape is nice and round, the symmetry is almost perfect... But the most amazing thing are the nipples and areolas. You can really serve as an example of NBE success! Did you notice any facial changes?

You've underwent laser hair removal. Did you go to Yes Visage as we discussed earlier? I've got the folliculitis after the first treatment as well. I cured it with erythromycine solution and corticosteroid ointment. However, after the second and third session the reaction was only mild. Next week I have my fourth session and so far I really love the effects. Do you plan to continue with electrolysis after finishing the laser? I ask because I do Wink  . I am also thinking about having hydroxyapatite cheek fillings done at the same private clinic.

And... transition? Well girl, If I remember correctly it is quite a change since we've last met. All I can do is to wish you good luck. It really is not an easy path, but sometimes we really have no choice and our subconscious is slowly driving us in inevitable direction. Do you plan to see the therapist in Brno or in Prague?

Anyway, what is your new female name? Wink 

Poly
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#42

Holy smokes!!!

Looking amazing! Best of luck as you turn to the next phase of your life!

Hugs!

~H
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#43

Stevenator, I can't vouch for reishi. Compared to other products I've seen, my extract is suspiciously cheap and I'm not convinced it actually does much against DHT. I just keep restocking automatically... I'll look in other options next time.

Bobbi & Lotus, I keep thinking about HRT because I um... want to get closer to being a woman. Breasts have never been the primary goal. Am I sticking to the wrong forum maybe?Big Grin After all, why did you switch to HRT Lotus? It would be kinda overkill if you were exclusively after breast, wouldn't it?

Poly, facial changes seemed pronounced during the first 6 months maybe, now not so much or for the worse. Could be the time catching up with me. Or that my goal was to look like feminine guy, now the wishful thinking is to look like a woman and the standards are suddenly set impossibly high. 
Yup, Yes Visage. I relayed to them your experience and my concerns and they dismissed them, "No, we've never heard about that!" Oh well. As of now I've got no further plans beyond the laser. 
Transition is just talk at the moment. But we all know how it goes: first it's just an idea, then thought, then talk, then tentative steps ("Come on, it's just harmless fun..."), then work with that dogged look in the eye...
I don't even know where should I move too, Prague or Brno. Not London, that's for sure. Let's meet when I get back.
And the name is (blush) KláraBig Grin.

Thanks for the comments!
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#44

:UPDATED:
Oki, I have no words to describe how beautiful you have become. You are Astonishing. I see your Breasts and Feminine Figure, and I am just left in awe. There is just no way for my brain to process it all. It's a womanly body for sure, that makes me wonder how you ever could be comfortable in 'male' clothes ever again... much less i wonder how your jeans/bottoms fit...

Gosh, i know all too well the effects of estrogen from any source, on the body. so i know if you have that much growth up top. Feminisation of everything else must have followed suite. (Usually you dont even notice it!)

HRT: I suggest a Endocrinologist and Therapist. Most therapist given your level of development, wouldnt even blink twice at writing that letter for recommendation.
HOWEVER, if you cannot wait, or if thats not possible, i highly Suggest a Informed Consent Model, Clinic. While the treatment is less targeted at your needs and more targeted at the general guidelines(outlines). Its better to be under a doctors care, than self-medicating in the first place... We can be our best doctors, but if something goes wrong we have to pay the bill... its not pretty.

Clothes shopping: I find it good to take a look at what my peers, female and trans alike are wearing. the picture myself in them, if I can't visualise it then I go try them on. you need to feel that confidence you have deep inside and bring it to the surface. you have it, its in your figure and your smile. Dont be afraid of who you are, be proud of it. OWN IT. Own your skin, Heart and Mind, and follow those desires into the fabric oasis. - I'd go shopping with you if we were close, I love helping others and it helps keep me confident when im shopping...

Hair: you are so lucky, i cant do laser/electrolysis yet. $$$ is my limiting factor.

Nails: Dont just tease us with them, let us see it. We all love the way your looking, be proud of your nails Smile

Family: Dont feel at all bad, we have all been in your position when going the transition route. its why alot leave places like this. i wont though, i see the valuable asset i can be to others. I imagine your family sees the same thing we do, show them how it makes you happy. They wont question it Smile - Gosh i know i was sweating bullets the first time i showed up to there doorstep in a pair of leggings, a cute top and runners. They smiled after the initial shock, they realised, my real happiness, is coming out, so there is no reason to question or stop me.

Friends/groups: I'm working on this myself, it seems so hard to find others. people that can understand and relate. I cant find a support group here, and i doubt i ever really will. but it wont stop me from trying!

Partners/Guys: Ughh dont get me started on the dating life... been there already, albeit i deal with the drama of being hit on and not wanting to even be noticed... but dealing with a partner is alot of woes that we all go through. Remember, as long as you 'appear' as presenting male, men will see you that way. Even if they dont really trust your expression, because it doesnt feel earnest or complete. I find it much easier when desiring a male partner to come at it from both a sexual side and romantic. Apply to there interest, but play slightly hard to get. Once they are hooked, its rather rare for them to feel disgust when they put so much effort into 'catching' you. Men are usually predatory and aggressive, but not always the case. Remember to feel a persons personality to better understand who they are before going into anything further. - I suggest the typical date/dinner type to start with, feel them out by letting them know you support Transgender rights. You have friends and family members that are. Keywords will key you into theyre real emotions on the matters that affect us...

MOST Importantly! Remain safe at all times, while being with a partner, whether presenting as male or female, it comes with alot of risks...
Quite a few Gay men, Will not date Transgender women out of principal. We are not desirable, because we are women, regardless of sexual orientation, Sexual Organs and Physical Appearance.
Quite a few Straight men, Will not date Transgender women out of fear. While this is not always the case, you can often get them to move past that fear and have meaningful, romantic relationships. Its often either Sex or Nothing, keep this in mind.

Do what CIS women do, Feel the person out for compatibilities with well placed conversation, light flirting and playing hard to get. the idea being to judge there character and affinity to a potential relationship. Not to push them away or to assume anything. Remember, They WANT you, or the situation wouldnt of occured. Confidence is your Ally.

Word of Warning: Alot of us, get into the trappings of a relationship and forget we are in transition. we put important things to the back burner and get our selves into a situation.
Whether your plans are years off or months/days into the future. Always put your real happiness first, not momentary pleasure. Because its easy to be happy for a moment, its hard to be happy for a lifetime.

--------

I wanted to also say, while bigger city's come with more options, there is typically a higher risk too. its a 50/50 coin. Be safe and dont travel Alone.
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#45

Hi Oki, congrats on your growth! I'm trying to determine if I have a similar body as you. Do you mind if you can share your age, weight, and height before you started your program? Thanks!
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#46

Uh-oh, Eden, how do I respond to the post like this?Big Grin
The zeal made me smile and chuckle upon the first reading, but soon I realised that without this crusader-like attitude towards my cause I just won't make any of my dreams come true. It might seem unbelievable, given my "results", but deep inside I still see myself as just playing some casual private game which I can step outside of any time it gets too intense. And I constantly abuse this escape backdoor to safety Angry.
But how do I achieve the paradigm shift? From being ashamed to being proud? I've recently tried (the spirit of the post on my mind) to consciously push myself the extra bit, disregarding ingrained notions of appropriateness, ignoring the screaming disonance, letting my hair down. Even though it feels fake and like a lie, repeated a hundred times it might become the truth, become me.
And it might be my only chance, because I'm fed up with my male personality. Often paralysed by calculating and over-thinking, with no emotion and spontaneity. On those (alas, how rare) occasions I feel like a woman it's like some happy uninhibited autopilot takes over me and guides me by intuition. It's the moments like these and the possibility of bringing out and nurturing this part of me that gives me hope.
Ah well, I respond with another soul-searching rant... RolleyesI suppose I need to prioritize finding a therapist and a support groupSmile.
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#47

Oh hi, it was 30 years and 195 cm and around 70 kgSmile.
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#48

(13-04-2017, 12:00 AM)oki Wrote:  Oh hi, it was 30 years and 195 cm and around 70 kgSmile.

Cool! I'm around the same age, I'm shorter, but I think you may be a tad bit skinnier than me for your height, but not by too much.
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#49

Oh I forgot one more thing I forgot...

Are you still not seeing any changes in semen? What are you basing this off of? Risk of being infertile is the main thing holding me back from HRT or NBE, but I was wondering if there are safe periods of taking it where I won't get permanent infertility but still get some permanent breast growth.
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#50

Oh to be a shorty... life would be beautifulBig Grin. Just imagine the world where the sleeves fit!Big Grin

No changes I can talk of. I'm not basing it off of anything though, I don't care about this. 
However the libido is "normal", that is quite constant, quite high. Coupled with the unrelenting body hair it makes me doubt my choice of AAs.
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