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Some Serious Soul Searching

#1

One thing I can say for sure .... deciding what to do if anything is not
an easy decision. And I'm taking all of the advice and warnings very seriously and trying to dig real dig for some answers.

This morning I read a post that Chrissie made where she talked alot about the feminization that she experienced taking PM. None of the changes that she talked about scared me (except maybe getting so weak that I might have to ask a man for help) .... as a matter of fact I
saw them as traits that I would like to have.

But that's all easy from where I sit now ... I haven't started to really feel them so I don't know how will really feel ... how can any of us

So here's my question .... can the transformation be taken slowly. Alowing oneself to notice the changes, "feel" and "live them" and then deciding if ones commitment is real?

I'm really not in a hurry ... BUT I am feeling things that I want to understand more.

Can one start the journey and then along the way decide ..

1. This isn't what I thought it was .... and turn back?

2. This is as far as I want to go ... my breasts are the size I want and I'm feeling "less intensely male" and stay at that point?

3. This is TRULY ME and I'll never go back

I keep going back and forth on what to do and what to take ... cause I'm not sure what I will REALLY FEEL when my breasts start to feel the things that many talk about in these forums. Or when I look down and see that my moobs aren't moobs anymore. OR when I start to think and feel more like a women.

Can I start with a small daily dose of let's say PM ... keep a diary along the way thinking hard about my transition and taking time to understand everything that I'm seeing and feeling and THEN DECIDE whether I want to go forward or turn back?

I really don't think I will do anything more than "speculate" until I feel it for myself.

Karen







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#2

Karen,

You are very much correct in asking these important questions,

That is indeed the complete point of the herbs vs synthetics,
herbs are slower and controllable , with the exception of pm at high dose for some,

There is a wonderful site called evanesce herbal , Dianne at the phoenix project, study it ,

There are girls on there who have fully transformed, partially transformed and many are happily married and functioning as "the balance can be maintained",

Herbs work end of,

Also many girls take herbs on the phoenix site too cool T levels and not actually feminise, that is the wide degree that herbs can offer,

Now in my view pm can be quick or slow,so just take it easy,

Absololutely take accurate notes and keep a journal so if your mind starts playing tricks then you have a point of reference.

Also PM has now beed added too the evanesce formulations,

In my view herbs are used for partial people like me, who actually produce far too much testoterone which then makes me feel as if want to be female, yes happens,

They are also baby steps, so you can take new breasts and feelings for a test drive

Remember you have a will, and you can stop,

Julie





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#3

(06-09-2011, 11:59 AM)julieTG Wrote:  In my view herbs are used for partial people like me, who actually produce far too much testoterone which then makes me feel as if want to be female, yes happens.

julieTG,

Well this one sure caught my eye. I started Testosterone Replacement Therapy about 3 months ago .... and these feelings have been developing since then ... and getting stronger and stronger I might add as time goes on.

Can you direct me to any sites where I can do some reading about this? I've been tested several times and my levels are all within expected ranges for my age BUT maybe the sudden increase from the "low" levels that I had before replacement therapy triggered what I am feeling.

karen Huh





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#4

yes agreed could be
go too

www.myevanesce.com

ask Dianne

she has a wealth of knowledge

Julie

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#5

The general consensus is that herbs definitely work slowly enough that you can adjust, stop or reverse what you are doing. It has been said a number of times that after you get the firm "ball" under the nipple that you can only get rid of the fat-supplemented shape of your boobs by stopping; the ball will remain because it is development of glands, ducts, whatever underneath. The common thing said is that it can take 3-6 months to get the boob development going.

I'm not sure what the interaction would be between your testosterone therapy and herbs though. If you stop that therapy and go with a minimum pm dose, I bet you would see real growth in 3 months or less. It seems to me that the therapy you are on and the growth you think you want are at odds with each other. I'm not sure how you'll resolve that, but your thread title sure is appropriate. Good luck and happiness with whichever way you go.
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#6

Hi Karen,

After a long time on little testosterone, you need to adjust to what it does. You need to learn to see the difference between being attracted to women and wanting to be a woman.

PM stabilises and ups mood, and is therefore a trap for someone in your situation. By the time you see what it does to your body and to your life, you are so happy you don't care any more.

I would only start PM after being off testim for at least a few months.
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#7

For all those that replied .....

I did some "REAL INFORMATIVE" reading on http://myevanesce.com/

Specifically .....

"Excessive testosterone levels can even cause born-males to want to be female at times, or fantasize about being feminine some day, then flip-flop to feeling like a born-male “normal” on other days. It’s a swinging pendulum that scrambles the functioning of your brain cells and can make you question your sanity."

That was enough to get me thinking and "SLAMMING ON THE BRAKES"

Very good chance that the feelings that I am having of late are due to the sudden increase in my testosterone level due to testim and my body don't know what to do with it yet.

So for now ..... nothing is going into the bod until I sort this out.

I sincerely thank you ALL for giving me enough info and questions to make me think. julieTG .... a special thanks goes out to you. Lots of great info on "myevanesce.com" .... I suggest that anyone that hasn't been to that site do so ..... allot of great explanations that my help clear up any questions that you may have .... if you have any that is

Karen







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#8

My Pleasure
Julie

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#9

It is an interesting site, but I noticed quite a few things that make me seriously doubt their grasp of the biochemistry and physiology involved. The primary but certainly not the only thing is that the site claims phytoestrogens do not cause feminization but provide the building blocks for the body to make estrogen. This statement alone is completely contrary to just about everything I have read about phytoestrogens and their affect on the body.

I also note that they DON'T list any ingredients except pueraria mirifica and pueraria lobata. The lobata variety is NOT nearly as high in phytoestrogens as mirifica and probably not worth taking for breast growth. Wonder why they make a point of including it?

Also, the cost compared to pure PM seems extremely high.

Just my opinion though.
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#10

morning chrishoney,

I would have liked to see ingrediants too .... and I agree that monthly cost seems that it would be a little high.

I wonder if the ingrediants were listed that it would allow someone to get those specific ingrediants elsewhere at a lower cost.

I DID like the articles .... I thought they gave an "understandable" explanation of hormones and how they work in the body and with each other.

I'm no expert .... I haven't broken apart each and validated the content.

From a personal point of view, I guess the articles about "high levels of testosterone and the effects" are what I related most too.

Hugs .... Karen





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