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Selfie time (line)!

#1

Dear friends,

I apologise for my very long absence. My last update post was back in September 2017, and since then I have been silent. It is not that I disappeared completely. I lurked the boards from time to time. However, it appears that what happened to me is similar to other girls on these forums who took the path of full transition. We just post less and less often.

But I didn't forget about you, about all the support I got from people on this discussion board. Looking back, my presence here was instrumental for my development. This forum gave me the opportunity to show my progress, and I took my first baby steps that finally resulted in my transition. I am very grateful I had an opportunity to be here and to speak to you.

You may have questions about what happened to me and what is my current status. To give you some idea about my developments, I am sending a selfie time-line since my first dose of HRT back in January 2018.

As you maybe remember, I came out to my family in January 2017 before my first session with a sexologist. The whole year 2017 I was trying to learn about myself better and to decide if the transition is the best option. But the more people knew that I am trans, the more I realised that this is the right path and maybe the only path for me. Yes, I had and I still have many challenges to overcome. One of the biggest challenges was an episode of optic neuritis in July 2017. However, because the symptoms were fortunately mild, it was diagnosed much later, in January 2018. I was devastated. Optic neuritis means approximately 50 % risk of developing multiple sclerosis in 5 years. Moreover, the vision on my right eye will probably never fully recover. It fluctuates, sometimes I see like through shiny fog or blue filter, especially when tired, stressed or in heat. In this position, I had to decide - put my transition on hold or continue even faster. I decided on the second option. I thought that I might very well try to live the fullest. I took it as a warning: "You never know, what can happen. Live!" And so I lived. At the end of January, I started HRT (the first picture is with my very first boxes of HRT).

The first photo from April is from my first trip out as me during the daylight. The second April selfie is taken during the make-up lessons. Since then I began to go out presenting as a woman more and more often. Fortunately, I seemed to pass reasonably well. People weren't noticing anything, and it gave me more courage. Wink

May photo is before my first trip by train and the whole day spent in a different city as me. June photos are documenting my first visit to a theatre.

The second July photo in a black shirt was taken during the metal festival and it was one of the last times I was outside as a "kind-of-man". I realised that I don't feel well when I try to present as a man and moreover, at that point it was easier to pass as a woman. Even in male clothes, people often addressed me as "ma'am". Tongue

In August, I went full-time. Photos from that month were made in Málaga. Making the whole trip as my true self was very beautiful. I was finally able to show myself in all those summer clothes! Big Grin

The last set of photos are from September 2018 to January 2019. The photo from December shows the best my current status.

My current regime is as follows:

Estrofem (estradiol) 4 mg a day
Androcur (cyproterone) 50 mg a day

To lower risk of another bout of optic neuritis:
Borage oil (source of gamma-linoleic acid) 2000 mg a day
D3 vitamin 5000 I.U. a day
DHEA 50 mg a day
Estriol cream twice a day one week a month

Other supplements:
Omega-3 fatty acids
Collagen
Hyaluronic acid
Progesterone cream once a day on the breast area

Other approaches:
Breast massage with walnut oil and Aloe vera gel once a day

I could write very long about my adventures, challenges and further plans. If you are interested to hear more or see some pictures in higher resolution, please ask in this thread. I'll try to answer as soon as possible.

Yours,

Elisa (aka polymorphis)


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#2

Jaw droppingly stunning, but then you already know I think that
Good to have you back
X
Julie
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#3

I’m thankful you dropped by to say hello. You look so 
happy now! So pretty, too!! What a beautiful bust you 
achieved, too!! Poly, I know you used to have a very 
supportive girlfriend. Is she still by your side? You’ve 
turned into such a beautiful woman! How many times 
a day do you get asked out?!! HaHa!! Thanks for saying 
Hello!! 

XOXO
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#4

Julie> Thank you very much! I know you're one of my first and greatest supporters here Blush  .

Stevenator> Hello! Thank you for your reply and the words of praise! Yes, hormones work well on me. I suspect that the fact I react so strongly to estrogens and that I am trans may have a common cause. I know you didn't ask, but just for your curiosity, my breasts are currently of size 80D according to a professional bra-fitting. And I think they're still growing. 

My girlfriend is still with me. I love her very much, and I cherish every moment with her because I am not sure how long it will last. This is another big challenge. We love each other, we like our life together, but every step I make causes a very strong emotional reaction in her: hormones, coming-out at work last May, starting going to work dressed as me, first public lecture etc. She is always sad and angry Sad  . The next trial will be getting the name change. Not mentioning the GRS I plan next year. She repeatedly stated she was not able to live with a "whole woman".

Fortunately, men don't ask me out. Either I don't look that good in real life or I just don't socialise enough. I don't know, but at least I don't have to learn how to deflect unwanted attention Wink  .

E.
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#5

Elisa:

We haven't "met" (I was lurking the last time you posted), but I've read your thread carefully and was inspired by the amazing results you were getting using NBE. It's so great that you've been able to transition into the beautiful woman you always were. I wish you all the best with your relationship.

PS: I can't decide whether I want to be you or be with you.
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#6

80D! Wow you look great! It really suits you well! 
I’ve followed your progress & story from the beginning. 
Women do react funny, don’t they? My wife flipped when
I first shaved my legs. She wasn’t the first s/o, g/f, to do 
so. But, she’s now wearing my bras so go figure. HaHa. 
I hope things work out for you with her. If ever I found 
myself single, and I’d definitely consider an oriecthomy. 
Thank you for saying hello. I’ve come to realize that with 
NBE/Trans, once (you) reach a certain plateau, people 
tend to move on. It’s hard sometimes losing online friends
you’ve grown to love over time. I wish you the very best 
and I’m so glad that you’re happy. You look Beautiful! 

XOXO
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#7

What a metamorphosis, truly inspiring.   

I hope to look as feminine as you do. How lovely to have a GG helping to support your endeavors, but am sorry to hear about her reactions to GRS. 

You go girl, here are my hopes to you!

Best wishes,
Pandora! Wink
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#8

Nipply Russel> Thank you for the reply! Blush  Yes, even the NBE worked well. However, the HRT is a lot stronger and the longer I take hormones, the more changes I observe. What is really pleasant is how natural it feels. I don't understand how I was able to deny myself for so long. And about the PS: For many years I also didn't know if I want to be with a girl I like or be her. Now I know it... I love being myself.  Big Grin

Stevenator> I was also surprised with the measurement. I tended to wear a smaller cup size and larger circumference. Now I buy bras according to the recommendation and they really do fit better. I just had to get used to more "fit" around my chest. What I've learned is that in transwomen breasts usually appear smaller then they are because of the wider ribcage. Breast also often tend to be wide set. Now I try to compensate for it by exercise targeted on pectoral muscles and it seems to work.

Yes, you are right that people who move with a transition somehow lose motivation to post more often. In me, it was mostly because I was busy with work and transition. It is not easy to transition while under full workload. I thought that after coming-out at work I would be given an opportunity to adapt, but it was not the case. For example today I had 4 - 5 hours of lecturing. Fortunately, I trained my voice a lot... 

Pandora> What a lovely name! Yes, trans-feeling are sometimes like closed in a Pandora's box and once you open it... It is very nice I can be an inspiration. Find a source of your inner feminity, let this energy flow through you and guide your every step and you'll get to it! Wink
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#9

It is so good to hear from you, Poly.  You are gorgeous, and clearly transition suits you well.  You are also very brave!

I am sorry that your relationship with your girlfriend has been difficult.  I understand the desire to stay with someone you love but also recognize the strain that it places on a loved one to have the ground shift beneath their feet.
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#10

Wow. You look very beautiful. I'm just starting hrt  low dose of Spiro and had one injection . Dr wanted to start slow to see how I would react. Hopefully to be half as pretty as you.
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